The Price of Simplicity
by peachbxtt
Summary: Tsuru is a simple girl and knows little of the pain of being a shinobi. Along with that, she's loud, annoying, and rebellious. That's what Kakashi initially believed about this girl when first meeting her. However, as people we often forget that pain is relative and Kakashi will have to realize who really is oblivious.
1. Chapter 1

The darkest times of Kakashi Hatake's life were in his youth. The time which many advise you not to waste were tossed in the throes of war for Kakashi. He was bitter. So bitter for so many years and often wondered what the point of living was. However, he swore to himself since he was a little boy that suicide was not an option. Suicide was for cop outs like his father was when the man had left his son that one brutal night. So, Kakashi contemplated to the best way or any acceptable way for a shinobi to die.

By twenty-three, Kakashi was already a well established ninja in Konoha. He had climbed the ranks quickly and by the time he was sixteen, he had already become an ANBU captain. Here he was. Nine years and still an ANBU. Seven years and still a captain. Kakashi had stopped caring for rankings the moment he understood the burden that came with excellence.

"It's settled then!" his "eternal rival" Gai yelled fiercely. "Kakashi, you're coming out with us tonight!"

Gai hadn't changed much in Karachi's eyes. He was still annoying and much too intense, but Gai was perhaps the only person Kakashi found some comfort in. However, Gai's attempts to get Kakashi to socialize was starting to get on his nerves.

"Tonight," Gai continued, "you and I will battle over and over again! We'll see who the best drinker is! We will see who can get the most girls! We will see-"

"You can stop," Kakashi denied cooly. "I won't be going out."

"I think you misunderstand," Gai almost growled. "This is no request nor is it a simple invitation. It is a challenge!"

Kakashi sighed. Had he said no to Gai's demand…well…no wouldn't have been an acceptable answer. It was Kakashi's fault in the first place for telling the man he was given a day off the very next day.

Gai had come to visit Kakashi who was getting treated at the hospital for some injuries and a checkup from his previous mission. Although Kakashi hated being in the hospital, it was routine to go and Kakashi liked having routines.

Kakashi let the sounds of Gai drown out as he looked up at the ceiling wondering what he'd gotten into. The two walked down the hall way towards the lobby of the hospital when a girl walked by. Neither of the ninjas noticed her. She was just a patient wearing clothes provided by the hospital. She seemed rather happy and walked with a smile on her face that is until she tripped over seemingly nothing and fell fatefully right in front of two ninjas.

"Are you okay?" Kakashi asked offering a hand to help her up.

"I'm fine!" she replied obviously flustered. She ignored the hand that Kakashi held out and rushed past the two before they could get a glimpse of her face.

"She looked a little young to be in the hospital," Gai noted out loud.

"Yeah," Kakashi concurred. "But you never know what happens in someone's life. Look at me, I come here all the time."

The bushy browed man merely blinked unsure if Kakashi was being serious or had told a joke.

Night came in almost no time. The sun had gown down and the village lights turned on. There were no kids out on the streets during this hour unless they were trying to sneak into bars to get their first tastes of alcohol with some thrill on the side. Honestly, Kakashi could spot those kids in the farthest corner of the bar from over a mile away without the help of his Sharingan. They were visibly attempting to contain their excitement and attempting to ignore the fact that they stuck out like a sore probably didn't realize that he was glaring at the boys, but Kakashi's friends surely did.

"Hey," Asuma called out to Kakashi. "Just let them be. They're just having fun."

"Yeah!" Genma jokingly snapped all too stoic man. "The party's here, Kakashi!"

In Kakashi's mind, he was thinking about how ungrateful those kids were acting. People like him from a young age put their lives on the line so that people like them could be safe and away from war. But that's the thing, isn't it? They didn't know war because people like Kakashi had made it so they wouldn't need to know war. Finally caving into his friends' desires, he rejoined the group with a shot of sake which was met with a round of cheers from the other four men.

"Oh, Raido!" Genma drunkenly whispered to his friend sitting beside him. "Look at that lady who just walked in. Isn't she pretty?"

Genma's drunk whisper reached everyone's ears, and certainly at the door was a very pretty woman with blonde hair that looked almost white and a pair of gray eyes. She wore a tight black dress with long lace sleeves and a pair of black heels. Talk immediately began circulating around the bar. Some speculated, she might have been a model although she looked a little short to be a model. Others theorized the girl was an actress, however, no one had seen her in any sort of production before.

Whoever she was, she seemed to be alone. Kakashi noticed that she had the same light of excitement and innocence in her eyes as the underage fellows who thought that they had beat the system. A naive girl at a bar alone only screamed danger. As predicted, a rugged man with a red flush spread across his cheeks approached the woman.

"Do we stop him?" Raido asks the group.

"I don't know," Asuma added.

"Did she not come with anyone?" Genma inquired further.

"If no one's going to to take this chance, then I-" Gai stopped abruptly as Kakashi got up from his seat towards the girl who was clearly about to be harassed.

"Oh," Asuma said surprised, "I guess even Kakashi can't resist a beautiful damsel in distress."

In truth, Kakashi just about had it with being surrounded by such annoying people. He slowly walked over watching as the drunk man flirted with the girl who looked unsure of what to do.

"Are you new here?" the man slurred. "If you are, I'll buy you a drink and I could show you around the village tonight."

"Uh," she stammered, "no. I was actually born and raised here. Also, I don't drink."

"Eh? No way. A pretty face like your's is something no one could forget!"

The stranger leaned closer and placed a hand on the woman's knee. His face was right beside her ear when a shadow casted over his back. The woman looked up to see Kakashi with a dark glare in his eyes. It honestly frightened her too.

"If you don't want any trouble," Kakashi started to advise, "you'll go back to your seat."

"And who do you think you-" the man cut himself off as turned around. "K-K-Kakashi-san! What a surprise!"

The woman watched as the man stuttered like a baby before Kakashi.

"P-Please," he got up and bowed, "excuse me!"

Kakashi glared down the man as he cowered and rushed away bumping into various chairs on his way back. He heard the woman sigh in relief. When he turned his glare to the woman, she jumped. He noticed that all the girl had her table was a cup of water. Kakashi recalled that the woman had claimed that she doesn't drink.

"Oi," Kakashi called out to who seemed like the dumbest woman alive, "are you stupid?"

"Excuse me?" she asked taken aback.

"Hey," Gai rushed over to his friend, "calm down. You have to excuse him, he's been really tense lately! Let us take you home. You can trust us, we're noble shinobi of Konoha!"

"You heard me," Kakashi ignored Gai. "Are you stupid?"

The woman pouted. Gai could see the flames blaring between the two intense stares.

"Well, who are you to interfere in someone else's business?" she exclaimed in disbelief at the man's audacity.

Before Gai could mitigate the situation any father, Kakashi and Gai saw the woman's expression change from one of annoyance to surprise. As if on cue, another woman barged in.

"Tsuru nee-san!" she screamed angrily.

"Oh!" cried out the woman named Tsuru. "If it isn't my little sister! Fancy seeing you here, Hyo-chan!"

Then a sound like the crack of lightning made the whole bar still. Hyo slapped Tsuru right across her face. This shocked even Kakashi because he was intending on reprimanding the dimwitted girl, however, this other woman with dark hair stepped in.

The two, who had claimed to be sisters, seemed to be related in only subtle ways. While Tsuru's hair was light and long, Hyo's hair was dark and short. Tsuru was much prettier than Hyo who's appearance looked to be no more than average. However, the two had the same pale complexion and the same shade of gray eyes. Both were also rather short.

Another striking difference between the two was the existence of a Konoha hitae-ate around Hyo's forehead. She wore the standard shinobi outfit. Judging by what he could see, Karachi deducted that Hyo was probably someone who was less invested in how she looked as opposed to her older sister.

"Wait outside for me, nee-san," Hyo's voice was quiet and demanding. It sent cold air throughout the silently stunned bar.

Without complaint, the older sister did as she was told.

"Wasn't that a little too far?" Gai questioned Hyo. "You shouldn't disrespect those who are older than you."

Hyo glowered at the bushy browed jonin, "If she were your sister, you'd want to slap some sense into her too. The bitch keeps sneaking out of the hospital."

For a moment, Kakashi noticed Hyo's eyes grow grim before returning back to its original intensity.

_The hospital?_ Kakashi realized that Tsuru was the girl he had tried to help up earlier that day.

"But still…" Gai's voiced trailed off.

"I apologize," Hyo bowed to the two men. "I hope my sister didn't cause too much trouble for my seniors. I'll be going now."

Once the dark haired girl was gone, Kakashi said, "Gai."

"Yeah," Gai started, "I know. That Tsuru girl is the girl from the hospital."

"Yes, but there's something more than that."

"Hm? What might that be?"

"She doesn't seem to be a ninja, but she sensed her sister coming."

"You're right!"

"Oi!" Asuma called out to the two. "If you're done making a ruckus, come join us for Kings' Game!"

Gai marched happily back to the table amongst their friends. Kakashi too headed back, but with Tsuru in the back of his mind.

To put the facts together, Tsuru was undeniably beautiful; however, Kakashi had never seen her around before. She probably had some sort of condition that keeps her in the hospital. And it seemed that although she didn't appear to be a kunoichi like her sister, she showed signs that she was a sensory type ninja which was a rare talent to have and develop. A spy maybe?

In the end, the group of inebriated and rowdy men certainly provided as a much needed distraction for Kakashi. While Kakashi didn't really laugh or smile that night, he had to admit that he was rather entertained. Perhaps he was too accustomed in reading into things. Things aren't always as they seem; but as one of Konoha's elite shinobi he couldn't help but think of all possible scenarios from the best to the worst.

Nonetheless, Kakashi woke up with a raging hangover the next morning. Probably from all the thinking.


	2. Chapter 2

Another grueling S-rank mission sent Kakashi straight to the hospital, but this time he was to stay for a whole week. Usually his missions were simple assassinations of Rogue Ninjas, but this time there was a pesky interference that forced Kakashi to overuse his Sharingan.

He hated the being in the damn hospital. It was a place that made him extremely antsy and restless. Kakashi felt like he had to be doing something. And yet, he always found himself in this room with sterile white walls. Maybe he was too reckless.

Kakashi sat up in his bed with a book in hand. It wasn't anything particularly interesting, but it was educational. If he couldn't train and practice to develop his skills, he could read up and expand his knowledge. At the moment, Kakashi was reading a book about medical ninjutsu and the extent of its usage so far. Although Kakashi wasn't equipped to be a medical ninja, he thought it would be useful to know more about certain symptoms and how to approach situations without freaking out.

Just as Kakashi was about to turn a page in the book, he heard quick footsteps approaching his door. Since he was still pretty weak and had low mobility, he merely watched as someone barged into the room and slid the door shut. It was none other than, Tsuru who this time around was in her hospital clothes. It had been about a week since Kakashi last saw her.

"This is not good!" Tsuru whispered to herself before realizing that someone else was in the room with her. "Oh, no."

"Hello again," Kakashi greeted nonchalantly.

Tsuru turned around slowly with a sheepish look on her face, "You don't mind if I hand around here for a bit, do you?"

"Actually-," Kakashi didn't get the chance to answer.

"Wait a minute!" the woman exclaimed. "You're the freaky man that tried to scold me at the bar last week!"

"Ah, so you remember."

"You're not going to try me again are you?"

"You're only just about to get on my nerves, so no."

Tsuru groaned as she took a seat in the chair beside Kakashi's bed. This made Kakashi weirdly uncomfortable. He watched as she crossed her legs and arms with a pout on her pretty face.

"What are you running from?" Kakashi asked.

"Huh?" Tsuru let out. "Oh. I kind of refused to eat one of the meals, so they threatened to call my sister."

Kakashi recalled the dark haired girl who slapped Tsuru across the face.

"You mean Hyo-san?"

"Yeah! Do you know her?"

"Maybe I've seen her name in the system before."

"Really? I've heard she's pretty popular or at least well acknowledged in the shinobi community. It's pretty annoying honestly, she thinks she's all that just because she became a jonin at only 20 or whatever."

_She really likes to talk,_ Kakashi thought. "Well, if she's a jonin she must be pretty skilled."

"She's pretty cool I guess. Hyo works hard and she gets what she deserves."

"Hmm."

The two sat in silence which Tsuru felt obligated to break.

"I never got your name."

"It's Kakashi Hatake."

"Oh, you're pretty popular aren't you? Especially amongst the girls!"

"I wouldn't really know about that."

"I suppose you're quite handsome."

_Is she for real?_ Kakashi asked in his mind.

"Well, I'm Tsuru," Tsuru introduced herself with a big smile that showed her white teeth. "Do you mind if I ask how old you are, Kakashi-san?"

"Twenty-three."

Tsuru's eyes lit up, "Same! Well then, I don't think you'll mind me calling you Kakashi-kun!"

Kakashi furrowed his brows in disbelief at Tsuru who just ignored his discomfort. At this point in time, Kakashi wasn't really sure if he disliked the girl or just found her annoying. There were plenty of people around Kakashi that he found annoying, but didn't have much of a problem with. Example, Gai.

Tsuru's eyes widened right before the door swung open.

"Tsuru nee-san!" a deep growl suddenly burst into Kakashi's hospital room.

The man found himself rolling his eyes to look at the ceiling. There seemed to be no end from this these days.

"Hyo-chan!" Tsuru shrieked in fear.

"Why are you trying to avoid your meals?" Hyo continued to growl.

"W-w-well, you see…Uh…I think I've been gaining weight, so…"

"Hey," Kakashi tried to intervene. "Could you two take your little fight outside?"

Unfortunately no one was listening to the poor man. Hyo proceeded to lecture Tsuru on how she shouldn't be concerned with weight and she should be happy that she was gaining weight.

"Geez," Hyo sighed finally slowing down. "I really don't understand you sometimes."

"Um," Kakashi tried once more.

Hyo turned her head and panic settled in her eyes. A deep red blush spread across her face as she frantically lowered her head in a bow to her superior. This was a different side of Hyo that Kakashi didn't recall seeing at the bar. Then again, Hyo seemed to actually be genuinely furious that day.

"K-K-Kakashi-senpai!" Hyo yelled. "I didn't know this was your room!"

"You can drop the 'senpai,'" Kakashi assured.

"Wait," Tsuru joined. "Kakashi-kun, I thought you said you didn't know Hyo."

"Well," he began to answer, "I might have been on a mission or two with her."

"Kakashi-kun?" Hyo repeated Tsuru in another growl. "Don't disrespect your superiors!"

"Just because he's your superior doesn't mean that he's mine," Tsuru argued. "I'm not even a ninja. He and I are the same age anyways so I'm allowed to address him however I want."

Another sigh escaped Hyo's lips. Kakashi felt that these girls were a ticking time bomb together.

"We shouldn't stay here and bother Kakashi-senpai too much," Hyo noted. "We gave him enough trouble already. Let's go Tsuru. You need to eat. I'll ask if I can take you out for a real meal instead of the shit they give you here."

"Really?" Tsuru's eyes glistened and the two walked out of Kakashi's room in a civil manner debating whether they should have fish or beef.

Finally, silence. Kakashi sunk into the pillow that had been propping up his back. For some reason he felt a smile reach his face. Then a low laugh. He let his thoughts trace back to the girl named Tsuru who had the audacity to call an ANBU Black Ops captain "Kakashi-kun."

Tsuru walked with her beloved little sister out of the hospital. Hyo had struck a deal with a nurse that as long as Tsuru was back before sun down, she could leave. Tsuru's smile was bright like the sun that shone down on them excited for her first actual outing in a while. The two ultimately decided to get mentaiko udon which was one of Tsuru's favorite dishes. Hyo listened as her older sister endearingly went on about how excited she was to eat something that wasn't hospital food.

"The hospital food is really gross," Tsuru explained, "but when you have nothing else to eat, you kind of get used to it. At some point, you even start to enjoy it! So you end up eating more and more of what's on the tray! I've already gained 2 kilograms in the past week, Hyo-chan! But if I eat this udon, it'll spike up and I have to get weighed tomorrow!"

"Why are you so worried about your weight?" Hyo inquired annoyed. "Look at yourself, you're pretty thin already. You could honestly use the weight gain."

"But I'm not like you," Tsuru contended. "You're always active because you're a ninja so you stay in shape and eat whatever you want. But all I do is eat, sleep, and repeat."

"That's because-" someone cut

"Hyo-san!" it was someone Tsuru had never met before. He was another shinobi dressed in the same uniform as Hyo. Tsuru eyed him up and down. The man was tall, had a sweet smile, and his cheeks were the softest shade of pink that could be missed.

_Warm_, Tsuru noted to herself. _His chakra feels like I'm soaking up sunlight._

Tsuru also saw that his eyes were only on Hyo and paid no attention to Tsuru herself. He liked Hyo. This was clear.

"Kenta-san," Hyo said clearly oblivious to the man's feelings.

"I was wondering," Kenta was making an effort to keep his voice as clear as possible, "if you wanted to get lunch with me."

"I can't," Hyo replied cooly which looked to have struck Kenta's heart. "I'm supposed to have lunch with my sister here."

"Sister?" Kenta finally noticed Tsuru.

"Hello!" Tsuru greeted. "Are you Hyo-chan's friend? I'm Tsuru, it's nice to meet you!"

"Well I guess we should go," Hyo stated.

"Actually," Tsuru said, "I just remembered that I have physical therapy tomorrow and my sensei said that I shouldn't be too active today."

"Eh?" Hyo exclaimed. "We're just going for lunch."

"I know," Tsuru pouted, "but my sensei's really strict and tomorrow we're going to start working with weights. I think I'll just be going back then."

"Wait, Tsuru nee-san I have to escort you back!"

"Hyo-chan," Tsuru's tone was almost lecturing. "I'm not stupid. I know my way back. I promise, I won't run off this time!"

Tsuru turned her attention to Kenta, "Kenta-kun."

"Yes!" Kenta straightened up as Tsuru called his name.

"Look after my little sister, okay?" Tsuru put on one the most charming smiles Kenta had ever seen. He understood that Tsuru was giving him an opportunity.

"Of course!" Kenta nodded enthusiastically.

Tsuru hoped that Hyo's date was going well as she walked herself back down the halls of the hospital. With all honesty, she was jealous of Hyo because she had chances to go on dates and be a normal person. However, it was upsetting to see her have no interest in men at all. Her little sister was always so preoccupied with her missions and if it wasn't a mission then Hyo's attention was always on Tsuru. Tsuru was supposed to be the older sister. The one that Hyo could rely on, but it was always the other way around.

Out of nowhere, Tsuru felt her knees buckle and suddenly she was falling. She clenched her eyes shut as she mentally prepared to hit the ground, but someone caught her. Tsuru looked up to see Kakashi had caught her.

"Kakashi-kun?" was all she could muster in surprise.

"You okay?" he asked in that collected voice of his.

"Yeah, I think so." Tsuru got up and alternated bending each leg to check if she was okay.

"You fall an awful lot," Kakashi pointed out.

"I guess I'm just really clumsy!" Tsuru replied.

_She's lying_, Kakashi thought.

"Well then," Kakashi resumed walking in the opposite direction with a book in hand.

"Kakashi-kun!" Tsuru called out to him before it was too late.

"Hm?" Kakashi turned to see Tsuru who looked a little flustered.

"I have a favor to ask."


	3. Chapter 3

What had Kakashi gotten himself into? There he was being dragged around by this girl named Tsuru who he had only just met earlier that day. The two were still dressed in their hospital clothing, but had somehow managed to sneak out of the hospital. Kakashi had to admit that Tsuru had some skill when it came to escaping.

So what was the pair doing? Well, they doing nothing else than spying on Tsuru's little sister's date with a boy named Kenta. Kakashi didn't quite understand why Tsuru needed help in this matter when she seemed to be moving rather independently. All he really wanted to do was go back in bed and read his book.

"They're so cute!" Tsuru exclaimed as they hid behind a fence. She kept peeking around the corner to look into the udon restaurant. Hyo and Kenta were eating and seemed to be having a conversation. Kenta was laughing and blushing at everything Hyo was saying.

"I hope this one's a keeper," Tsuru verbalized her thoughts. Kakashi observed as Tsuru's face fell a little.

He looked at the two people eating in the restaurant then back to Tsuru who had a strange glimmer in her eyes. It was desire. Just then, Karachi realized that Tsuru probably didn't live a normal life. He wondered if she ever had and how long had she been in the hospital? What was she in there for?

"They're moving!" Tsuru giggled. "Where are they going?"

Kakashi and Tsuru continued to tail the two until the sun began to set. Nothing much had happened. They seemed to just talk and walk through the village. They followed them until Kenta brought Hyo to what appeared to be her apartment which was convenient place right beside the corner Tsuru and Kakashi were hiding behind.

"Thanks for walking me here," Hyo said. "You really didn't have to."

Kenta didn't say anything for a second and then, "Hyo-san."

"What is it?" Hyo questioned.

"I have a confession to make."

Kakashi saw the anticipation in Tsuru's eyes. He almost felt her heart beating as loud as Kenta's.

"I like you," Kenta admitted bravely. "Ever since I saw you perform in the chunin finals, I've kind of had a thing for you. I know that was a long time ago, but it was there I really understood how strong and hard working you are.

I know I'm not as talented as you are. I'm not even a jonin yet, but I just wanted to tell you my feelings! I hope you can accept them!"

Hyo parted her lips to reply, "I…I can't."

Tsuru's heart shattered with Kenta's.

"I'm sorry," Hyo apologized refusing to make eye contact with Kenta. "It's just that there's a lot of going on in my life right now. I don't think I'd be a very good girlfriend to you."

This struck something with Tsuru. The part that made Hyo's life so hectic was Tsuru after all.

"I see," Kenta's trailed off. "I guess, I'll let you be then. See you around, Hyo-san. I hope you at least had some fun today."

The moment Kenta was out of sight, Hyo called them out, "Tsuru nee-san, I know you're there. Come out."

Kakashi and Tsuru did as they were told.

"Nee-san," Hyo's tone was grim. "Please, don't set me up like that again."

"I was just trying to get you to have some fun," Tsuru pointed out.

"You wouldn't understand. Someone like you could never understand."

"What do you mean?"

"I've lost so much, nee-san." Hyo lifted her face revealing a scowl. Kakashi knew this expression too well. "I've grown up watching everyone around me die. It's the life of a shinobi, nee-san. I don't expect you to understand any of it, but I expect you to respect that lifestyle."

"There you go again," Tsuru laughed shakily. "Talking about how you choose not to live normally."

"Nothing about my life is normal!"

"Then what about me?" Tsuru had tears in her eyes. "What about me? I can't even leave the hospital without permission. I can't do anything without an escort. I can barely walk on my own! You actually have some sort of freedom, Hyo. I just want to see you have everything before I-"

"Just because you can't have something doesn't mean you should project your desires onto me. I'm not your little doll. I'm your sister!"

Kakashi wasn't really sure what to do. He felt awkward and out of place as the two sisters quarreled.

"Whatever," Hyo scoffed. "Kakashi-senpai, please take her back to the hospital."

"Don't-" Tsuru tried to stop her sister, but Hyo slammed the door right in her face. Tsuru hung her head low in defeat and started to tremble. Kakashi heard sniffles which only baffled him at what to do.

"Kakashi-kun?" Tsuru sniffled looking at the man with wet eyes and nose. "Am I a bad older sister?"

"Uh," was all Kakashi could muster.

Tsuru's lower lip stuck out as she wept softly. Kakashi thought this was somehow cute. She looked like a child that just got their lollipop taken from them.

"Hey," Kakashi said softly placing his hand on her shoulder. "The hospital's probably already found out that we're gone and we're going to get in trouble anyways. So, why don't we get some dinner in the village?"

The second Kakashi proposed this idea, Tsuru immediately flipped back to her old self with her eyes glistening with excitement. She really was like a child.

"You mean a date?" Tsuru was practically jumping.

"E-erm," Kakashi stammered but the look on Tsuru's face was hard to say no to. "Sure. A date."

Kakashi and Tsuru found themselves back at the udon place. He read his book as the girl slurped and chewed the thick noodles.

"Mmmm!" she exclaimed. "This place has the best udon! The noodles are so chewy! Hey, Kakashi-kun aren't you going to eat?"

"I'm finished," Kakashi pointed to his finish bowl while simultaneously flipping a page in his book.

"That was fast…"

Tsuru frowned as Kakashi's attention was clearly not on her.

"Kakashi-kun," she said sternly. "It's not polite to ignore a girl on a date! Especially the first date! Have ever even been on a date before?"

"No actually," Kakashi responded nonchalantly eyes still on the words in his book. "I'm not really on the whole dating scene."

"No way. You're pretty much every girl's dream."

"Am I?"

Forcefully, Tsuru snatched away Kakashi's book.

"Hey!" Kakashi's eyes narrowed at the woman who dangled his book between two fingers as if it were a dirty rag.

"So this is your very first date?"

"Yes. Please, give me my book back."

"Then I have to make it special!"

"No you really don't."

"Nonsense!"

This wasn't necessarily how he had imagined his first date with anyone. Roaming the village in hospital wear, going into different shops, and eating street food. Ever since he met Tsuru, it felt like he was being thrown into different situations he wasn't necessarily okay with. Yet, for some reason, he was letting himself get dragged around. It was all new to him. He had never felt something like this with another girl nor had he ever felt his wallet so empty.

"I promise I'll pay you back when we get back to the hospital!" Tsuru informed sweetly as she took a bite of her grilled octopus. "I just didn't bring any money with me this time!"

"Don't worry about it," Kakashi reassured. "I don't really spend much of my money, so I have quite bit saved in the bank."

"Ohoho," Tsuru teased. "A practical one I see."

Night had completely taken over the city and the two were making their way back to the hospital at a leisurely pace. Both had lost track of time.

"So tell me," Kakashi actually initiated the conversation, "is this your first date?"

Tsuru thought for a second before replying, "Nope!"

Something poked a hole Kakashi's dignity.

"But it's the first one I enjoyed," she added. "A lot of people ask me out on dates for some reason, but men only really want one thing from me. I mean it's different for everyone. Some guys only want me as a trophy. Others want me for sex which is just gross so I drop those right then and there. Then…"

Tsuru stopped in her tracks and her face fell. Her gray eyes dulled and she watched her feet as they kicked at the ground.

"Then," she proceeded, "when I tell them I have to go to hospital, they act all concerned. And when they realize that I'm sick, they all leave."

Kakashi thought back at how Hyo had lectured Tsuru on how she couldn't understand the life of a shinobi. This was a sentiment that Kakashi agreed with. Tsuru would never be able to understand the pain he and Hyo had most definitely gone through especially in the Third Great War. However, did Hyo know any of this about Tsuru?

"Kakashi-kun," Tsuru's voice was and she looked back up at him with a smile. "We're back."

Surely enough, there was the hospital. They snuck back into the hospital and Kakashi walked Tsuru right back to her room.

"I hope you had a good first date with me," Tsuru said.

"I guess it was alright," Kakashi answered.

Tsuru weakly punched the man's shoulder.

"Well I had a lot of fun," she professed. "Good night. I'll see you around the hospital again."

Kakashi noticed how she didn't ask for a second date. Perhaps he should have. Or maybe not. Maybe. Maybe not.


	4. Chapter 4

Kakashi didn't see Tsuru for the entire week. In fact, he hadn't seen her for almost a month. She didn't come pester him like he had done before. He even tried to find her in her room, but there was someone else there. Perhaps she had been discharged for the time being. No. Knowing Tsuru she would've come to Kakashi expressing with those sparkling eyes that she was finally getting out. On top of that, from the sound of it, it seemed as though she had been hospitalized for quite some time and wasn't going to get out soon.

However, there was no time to think about a simple civilian. In the present, Kakashi was in a pinch. He looked over at his teammate Tenzo, who he was hiding behind a rock with. The rest of his two other teammates had been cut down one after the other. This was a difficult battle and Kakashi was running low on chakra.

The worst part of his job as an ANBU captain wasn't all the fighting. Rather it was the last thing he had to do. Typically, when a ninja dies in action the survivors cannot afford to carry the body back for a proper burial or cremation. This was especially important for the ANBU Black Ops since one of their most important roles is to prevent anyone else getting important information about the village.

Kakashi and Tenzo panted as they stood over the dead bodies of their comrades. Their eyes had a faded and desensitized look to them. The physical battle might have been over, but these images will haunt them for the rest of their lives.

The two held their hands up in a sign and the bodies went up in blue flame leaving no trace of their existence behind.

It had been a while since Hyo had brought Tsuru home. Usually Tsuru was quite happy to be out of that wretched hospital bed, but she was different this time. It had all been so sudden and Hyo thought the experience must have shocked her. At least she was better.

"Tsuru nee-san," Hyo tapped her sister's shoulder as Tsuru looked out the window.

Tsuru turned to face Hyo.

"Do you want to take a walk?" Hyo asked. "We can do something fun today. Like go to the movies?"

"No thanks."

"Or I heard there was an arts and crafts fair! You love cute things. We can go shopping there."

"Hyo. Please."

Tsuru's plea was astringent. Hyo knew her sister was not the type to be so stern with her. In fact, it had always been the other way around. Tsuru was the free and rebellious spirit while Hyo adhered to the rules. Even though Hyo was the younger of the two, she was always the one that acted like a guardian. It was always Tsuru that wanted to go to different places and begged Hyo to beg the hospital to take her out to see things. "No" was not going to be acceptable.

Whenever Tsuru was down, it didn't take long for Hyo to bring her back up. Certainly bringing her to this little craft fair was a the right move. Tsuru jumped from one booth to the next observing all the things she deemed was adorable or beautiful. She complimented each artist for their work. Hyo watched endearingly. Tsuru was always kind to other and had a bright smile. The best part about Tsuru was that she was actually genuine.

Hyo actually used to be jealous of Tsuru because Tsuru was always the center of attention. Her sister was beautiful inside and out. Today Tsuru wore a light yellow sundress with a white cardigan on top and it was drawing male attention. Every shop they went to, the vendors were complimenting Tsuru and did not pay much attention to Hyo. Had they been much younger, Hyo would have been raging with envy. Thankfully, that jealousy had been replaced when Hyo discovered her talents as a kunoichi. Yet sometimes, Hyo still wished to look just a little bit more like Tsuru. Just a little bit more like their mother.

"Hyo-chan!" Tsuru chirped as she held up two keychains. Both looked like rabbits one white and one black with a golden bell charm also hanging off them. "Can I buy this?"

"Why are you asking me, stupid?" Hyo snapped. "You have money."

"Oh right!" Tsuru reached for her purse and pulled out some coins. "Here you go ma'am!"

"Thank you," the vendor smiled.

The vendor packaged the keychains in a small bag and handed it to Tsuru. Tsuru walked over to Hyo who was merely looking around at the scene around her. Slyly, Tsuru swept away her sister's weapon pouch.

"Hey!" Hyo cried. "Don't touch that! It's dangerous!"

"Oh Hyo," Tsuru sighed. "I've seen kunais before. Let me just give you this…TADA!"

Tsuru handed Hyo the pouch back. Hyo looked inside and there it was. The black rabbit keychain. Hyo toyed with it with her finger and the bell made a charming sound.

"Now we're matching!" Tsuru cheered showing her purse which also had the charm dangling off of it.

Hyo laughed in delight which made Tsuru unbelievably happy.

_Hyo's chakra feels like a summer breeze,_ Tsuru said in her head as she closed her eyes embracing the feeling.

The lovely feeling was then overpowered by something vaguely familiar. But it felt different. It was darker.

"Oh," Tsuru heard Hyo say. "Kakashi-senpai? What brings you here?"

Tsuru turned into the direction of Hyo's voice and saw Kakashi walking with someone in the same ANBU uniform.

"Oh," Kakashi said. "Hello."

He seemed a little spacey.

"Kakashi-kun!" One of Tsuru's ways of coping with stressful situation was to ignore them and be her enthusiastic self. "You brought a friend! Hi, I'm Tsuru and that's my little sister Hyo!"

"Yamato," the man blushed as he realized how pretty the woman before him was.

"Actually," Kakashi intercepted, "his name is Tenzo."

"Oi…"Tenzo pouted.

"Tenzo-kun?" Tsuru cocked her head cutely to the side then nodded. "That's good name."

Tenzo's pink cheeks were now a flaring red. Hyo furrowed her eyebrows at the man who was supposed to be a strong and composed ANBU Black Op.

"You guys should join us," Tsuru suggested. "I think it's almost time to eat, isn't it?"

"Oh yeah," Hyo agreed. "You're right, the sun's going to go down soon too."

"Then let's go!" Tsuru exclaimed. "I want mentaiko udon!"

"Again?" Hyo whined.

Hyo wasn't sure if the two boys had actually agreed to Tsuru's invitation, but the four sat in the restaurant together. Kakashi had already finished his bowl and the others were slowly working on theirs.

"So yummy!" Tsuru yelled. "I really needed this!"

Kakashi's eyebrow twitched showing that he was somewhat irked. Tsuru noted this in the back of her mind but chose to dismiss it. Something felt off about Kakashi today, but Tsuru felt that it wasn't her place to ask or pry. Truthfully, she had missed Kakashi and never really got a chance to tell him what had been happening for the past few weeks of absence. Then again, Tsuru was also sure that Kakashi himself was a busy man who wouldn't have time to wonder about such things.

"I think I'm going to go home," Kakashi told the group.

Tsuru abruptly stopped slurping her noodles and said with food with her mouth, "Why?"

"I'm just a little exhausted," Kakashi explained. "It's been a long day."

"But you only just joined us," Tsuru complained. "And-"

"Excuse me," Kakashi cut Tsuru off and got up from his seat.

"Well that's rude," Tsuru sassily murmured just loud enough for everyone to hear.

"What was that?" Kakashi snapped. The two met each other's glare.

"Tsuru nee-san," Hyo warned.

"I said," Tsuru began to repeat herself with a sarcastic smile, "that was rude."

The tall man was getting on Tsuru's nerves. As much as she wanted to see him, she also wanted to help alleviate his own grim aura. So, when he rejected her efforts it made her tick.

"Tch," Kakashi scoffed. "I said I was tired."

"Then you cut me off," Tsuru challenged. "I just wanted to help."

"Help?" Kakashi's tone almost scared Tsuru. "You just want to stick your nose where it doesn't belong."

"Kakashi-senpai," Tenzo grabbed Kakashi's arm hoping he would stop, but no person had made Kakashi feel such extremities.

"You only want 'help' because you for some reason feel responsible for everything," Kakashi pushed. "While you believe that you're doing good, in reality, you're only being selfish. You do 'good' things because it'll make you feel more fulfilled. So you can feel like you weren't useless when you ultimately die."

Hyo and Tenzo stopped. Everything stopped. Tsuru's brain banged against her skull and her heart pounded with rage against his ribcage. It was the first time Hyo had seen her so angry.

"What do you know?" Tsuru screamed causing Kakashi to jump. "You're right I do things because I'm afraid I'm going to die! And it might be selfish! But you'd want to do the same if you were someone as _useless_ as me!

You know where I've been the past month? I-"

Suddenly, Tsuru collapsed to the floor.

"Nee-san!" Hyo cried immediately rushing down to grip Tsuru. Tsuru was panting and clutching at her chest. "You need to go to the hospital. You'll go into cardiac arrest again."

"No!" Tsuru protested but was obviously in pain. "Please…Just let me go home. Please. Please."

"Okay," Hyo's voice was shaken with worry. "Let me take you home."

"NO!" Tsuru yelled at her little sister. "I don't need you to hold my hand all the time."

"But…"

Somehow Tsuru forced herself to get it together. She picked herself up from the ground and without another word left the shop with her purse. Kakashi wasn't sure what had gotten over him. All he knew and all he could feel was the guilt.

"Kakashi-senpai," Hyo said despairingly. "You're right, you know. Someone like Tsuru nee-san could never understand the life of a shinobi. People like us live in a constant state of kill or be killed. We watch our friends and family die on the battlefield, and then we're expected to carry on.

However, I couldn't ever imagine what Tsuru nee-san is going through. The physical pain and the mental torment of knowing that there is no possibility of a future. The certainty that you can't even dream of growing old with someone or having children. Knowing that in the end, your existence serves no purpose. A mistake even. That you are, in fact, _useless_."


	5. Chapter 5

The sun was drooping into the horizon. The sky was a dark blue to orange gradient. Kakashi wasn't sure how to act or do anything at all when it came to Tsuru. It was the kind of feeling he used to have when his best friend and teammate, Obito Uchiha, was around. The unpredictability and the very force that took away all stability. At least when Obito was around, there was also Rin who could mediate and balance the two.

_I guess I'm really on my own, _Kakashi thought.

Kakashi sat on a stone bench watching as blue took over the sky and stars began peaking out. For some reason a warm laughter began to shake his body.

"Nee-san?" Hyo poked her older sister who reassumed her depressed state on the couch.

Tsuru herself has had a few brushes with death and it seemed that life did not want to give her over just yet. In times like this, she wondered who was the good guy and who was the bad guy. While we learn to appreciate and value the life we are given, life to some looks like a curse while death is the kindness that breaks it. Maybe the two are a tag team that likes to play with weak anomalies like Tsuru.

"Nee-san!" Hyo whined.

"What?" Tsuru whispered.

"I think you should find Kakashi-senpai," Hyo advised.

"Why should I do that?" Tsuru asked disinterested.

"Because you haven't given him a chance to understand you," Hyo claimed. "We all want our pain to be acknowledged, but in order to do that, we have to make others see."

"What does it matter? I'm going to die-"

A firm knock on the door cut Tsuru off and she knew exactly who it was. Hyo moved to answer the door and found none other than Kakashi Hatake.

"K-K-Kakashi-senpai!" Hyo yelped in surprise.

"Sorry for the intrusion," he apologized. "I was wondering if I could have some time with your sister."

Tsuru didn't move from her spot and continued to look out the window.

"You shouldn't be asking me for permission to talk with her," Hyo said to her superior. "Go ask her yourself."

Hyo removed herself from the scene and disappeared into her own room leaving the two in the living room. Tsuru still had her back to Kakashi not wishing to acknowledge his existing.

"Can we talk?" Kakashi asked Tsuru who remained silent. "I just-"

"It doesn't matter," Tsuru said. "Nothing matters anymore, Kakashi-kun."

He noticed how her voice began to tremble.

"I'm going to die," Tsuru wepted. "I don't know when, but I'm going to die. I feel it. There's nothing anyone can do. The worst part is knowing, it's better that I die. Sooner the better, right?"

Kakashi closed his eyes and opened them in a slow blink. He gingerly walked towards the couch then carelessly plopped himself beside Tsuru.

"Thank goodness!" he sighed. This caught Tsuru off guard. "I thought you were going to be so mad at me that you weren't going to call me 'Kakashi-kun.' You're too nice, Tsuru. I like that about you."

The temperature rose and it was visible on Tsuru's pale cheeks. Had Kakashi always been this charming?

"Hyo made me realize something," Kakashi said. "You and I aren't very different. And that's why I'm sorry."

"Geez," Tsuru giggled. There were tears still peaking out of the corners of her eyes that she was trying to wipe away. "You really don't know how to treat a lady, Kakashi-kun."

Hyo looked at the pair from around the corner of the hallway. They made a good couple, the two of them. Hyo's heart ached a little to see them like that. She wondered if either of them knew what they looked like from her perspective.

"Alright!" Hyo marched out holding a board and a container. "Kakashi-senpai, you came on a great night! Afterall, it's game night!"

"Yay!" Tsuru cheered. "You'll stay won't you, Kakashi-kun?"

"I guess I don't really have a choice," Kakashi answered.

Tsuru grinned from ear to ear.

"Should we order some food?" Hyo suggested. "Or maybe we can make some ramen."

"Mmm I like the idea of both," Tsuru contemplated with her sister.

Kakashi smiled. So this is what siblings were like.

It was around midnight when Kakashi's decided he probably should go home and get some sleep. Hyo had fallen asleep on the ground leaving only Tsuru to see Kakashi out.

"I hope you had some fun with us," Tsuru beamed up at Kakashi.

"I did," the positive response wasn't exactly something Tsuru expected but it made her happy nonetheless.

"Kakashi-kun. Thank you."

"What for?"

"A month ago, I went into cardiac arrest. I really could have died, but I didn't. Since then, I've been thinking why is it that I live? Why am I left alive? I grew up in the hospital and I've had friends who have had conditions worse than my own. There was a point where I watched 6 kids go in a matter of a month. One child after the next.

It's why I don't really have friends. I'm too scared to make many friends. All I needed was Hyo. Then I started wondering what would happen when Hyo left. If there came a day when Hyo dies before me. What then?

Then you came along and you gave me a little more meaning to live."

As touched as Kakashi was, the only reply he could muster was, "Well, you certainly seemed to be quite lively even before you met me."

Tsuru doubled over in laughter, "Kakashi-kun, you're so cold!"

The pretty woman calmed down and continued to speak, "If there's one thing I've learned from being terminally ill is that life is too short to be mean and spiteful. I've hated the world for putting me in this position, but I can't scream at the world to make it change me. I can't ask for it to make me different. There are just somethings that are out of our hands, so you need to take whatever is you can!"

"I see."

"Good night, Kakashi-kun." Tsuru leaned up on the tips of her toes and planted a gentle kiss on Kakashi's cheek. She felt his chakra burn soothingly like a fireplace or a campfire on a cold night.

Many of Kakashi's friends considered Kakashi an uncrackable mystery and approached him as such. However, they would also think that they have him somewhat figured out. They once attempted to try to figure out his ideal type of women. His friends deducted that it would be someone strong both physically and mentally. A woman just as calm, cool, and collected as he was. Just as mysterious maybe. Someone wise and an expert at…something. And perhaps, Kakashi believed that that was his ideal partner too.

But there she stood. Looking too thin under a baggy t-shirt and some sweat shorts. She probably couldn't even lift a sack of rice. Loud. Boisterous. Capricious. Not an expert at anything but being a fool. A person who chose to live like a fool because there was nothing else for her in the world. Not the exact opposite of what anyone would think Kakashi's type was, but undeniably different.


	6. Chapter 6

The two spent much more time together. Even though Kakashi was always busy doing missions, he'd always try to make time to say hello to Tsuru. One would believe that the two were actually dating. As much as Kakashi recognized his feelings, he denied them as well.

There were many times when he would just stare at her and realize that his heart was beating more prominently. It's something he's never really done before and didn't quite understand the effect Tsuru had on him.

Tsuru, on the other hand, did whatever she wanted whether she felt something or not. She was the type of girl that if you asked her on a date, she would say yes. Tsuru would go on a date with you if you were a little weird or even another girl. There wasn't any possibility she was opposed to. However, when it came to Kakashi, the two had never established that they were actually going on "dates."

She would not mind going on a second date with the man.

That day the two walked side by side as Kakashi's old classmates trailed behind watching carefully. They had invited the two to hang out like normal twenty-somethings do and they had to admit that Tsuru was fun but Kakashi was much too different.

"Do you think Kakashi's okay?" Asuma secretly whispered to Kurenai, his own lover.

"Asuma," Kurenai's tone was lecturing, "you shouldn't ask things like that."

"I'm with Asuma on this one," Gai admitted concerned. "This isn't really the Kakashi I know. This Kakashi actually seems…content. It's kind of scary."

"Maybe he's just happy," Kurenai defended.

"Maybe Tsuru's a witch," Asuma joked.

"Or a seductive demon!" Gai added.

"You guys!" Kurenai snapped.

"Is something wrong?" Tsuru inquired curiously.

The trio smirked nervously and pretended that there was nothing wrong. They actually quite liked Tsuru, but did she and Kakashi make a good pair? Could she fully understand what Kakashi was going through at this point in his life? Even they couldn't fully comprehend the prodigy, how could a pedestrian like Tsuru possibly even fathom the life of a shin obi?

The group stopped at a small dessert cafe to have dango and tea. It had been so long since Kakashi had joined them for something as simple and childish as rice cakes on a stick.

"A girl?" Kurenai said in shock. "You went on a date with a girl?"

"Yeah," Tsuru answer confidently. "What about it?"

"You mean you went out with her like a friend," Asuma tried to correct.

"No!" Tsuru shook her head. "I actually went on a _real_ date with another woman. Romantically."

"How does that even work?" Asuma raised an eyebrow.

"It works because love shouldn't be limited," Tsuru lectured. "Procreating and loving are two very different things. I can love and not have a child. I can have a love child and not love another. Even if I just take that out of the equation, it opens up so many more possibilities."

Kakashi didn't have an opinion when it came to such taboo topics. He didn't really care because he never thought he would ever find himself in a position to be able to love. However, hearing about Tsuru's fling with another woman certainly piqued his interest.

"So are you like…" Gai's question trailed off.

Tsuru sighed deeply in exasperation, "You guys really are clueless. If I'm going to die, I want to die having experienced as much as I can. I'm just like anyone else who wants to find love but I don't believe in restricting myself. Love is trial and error. There's no singular terminology to define your personal interests."

Asuma and Gai spoke between one another asking each other if they think Tsuru kissed the woman she had dated. If they had sex how that would work?

To be frank, Kakashi found Tsuru's perspective rather poignant. He could agree with the sentiment, but he still wasn't quite sure how to feel about the practice itself. Indeed, he would have to ask her about it more in depth later.

"So Tsuru," Kurenai, who was a little bit out of her comfort zone, began changing the subject.

"Yes?" Tsuru brightly responded.

"Would it be insensitive of me to ask what your illness is?" Kurenai questioned. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to."

Everyone fell quiet. Even Kakashi didn't know the answer to this and frankly, did not have the heart to ask.

"Well!" Tsuru seemed happy to answer. "It's a really rare condition where my chakra is basically against me."

Kakashi inwardly chuckled. Of course she would be open about this "trivial" thing.

"Against you?" Gai repeated.

"Mmhm," she nodded. "Chakra is made up of spiritual and physical force. It's something that everyone has. Shinobi are able to generate more and release it in the right areas in order to perform justus and do things that normal people can't. Am I correct?"

Everyone nodded.

"It's a difficult talent to nurture," Tsuru continued, "but it's also something people are born with and passed down. I was born into a family of shinobi too and that's why my little sister, Hyo, can perform jutsus. So why can't I? It should be written within my genetic makeup.

The answer: a mutation."

"What do you mean?" came Asuma's query.

"Like any genetic mutation that could cause things like down syndrome or some rare birth defect, the mutation can happen in the very gene that determines if you are capable of becoming a ninja or not. When it happens to most people, it means that they just won't be able to become ninja and have to think about a different career path.

However, in my case, my mutation is a little different. The amount of chakra I have and can generate should let me become a ninja like you guys. But instead of the chakra flowing outward and out of my chakra points, it goes inwards and begins to distress those points."

"I guess that wouldn't be impossible," Kurenai stated still confused. "So then, your own chakra is-"

"Eating away at my own body," Tsuru finished for Kurenai causing everyone to freeze in shock. "I don't have much fat or muscle because my own chakra has been burning away at them."

"I think I understand," Gai announced smacking a fist to his palm. "Instead of exerting itself out of your chakra points, your chakra builds up in those points causing them to swell. Without a place out, it flows back into itself."

"That would mean that your chakra points are constantly blocked and blocking themselves," Kakashi furthered.

"Bingo!" Tsuru yelped affirmatively.

"Then wouldn't the proper treatment be something like acupuncture?" Asuma pondered out loud. "A way to release all that pent up chakra."

"If only it were that easy," Tsuru eyes casted down. "I mean get treatment all the time. I go to acupuncture sessions twice a week and I take mountains of medicine to slow down the effects. While modern medicine and procedures have kept me alive this long, there's no way to completely stop it. Those points will just keep blocking themselves over and over. Stopping flow itself isn't an option either.

It's like by hit by the Hyuuga Clan's Gentle Fist over and over again. The points block themselves out on their own. Why that happens, no one really knows. I've been to so many doctors and no one seems to be able to crack this code. I've even been to the great Princess Tsunade. She came up with a theoretical procedure, but it's too risky."

"Well maybe some risks are worth taking," Kurenai pointed out.

"There's only a thirty-three chance chance I'd survive," Tsuru said with a dejected smile. "Because my condition affects my muscles directly, there are too many unpredictable things that can happen. Whether it be to my stomach, brain, or even my heart."

Kakashi recalled how Tsuru had gone into cardiac arrest not too long ago. The hospital would have kept a close eye on her, but decided that maybe a break would be good since her condition was stable after the surgery. She hadn't been back to the hospital since then, but there was no telling what could happen next. There was no way to predict when she would go back and how long for.

"Something that did help and a big reason I'm a live today is chakra control," Tsuru said. "I can at least keep it at bay at all times now with ease although there were times I almost died from overexertion. I think it also helped me begin to sense other people's chakra."

"That's right!" Gai realized. "You can sense other shinobi. I wasn't quite sure how you could do that, but I guess it makes sense now. If it weren't for this stupid illness of yours, you would've been one of us."

"Yeah," Kakashi noticed how Tsuru's voice had a hint of longing behind it. He didn't like how she romanticized the life of shinobi, but who could blame her? Anything was better than in the present.

The group of five spoke for a while longer about topics other than illnesses. Tsuru laughed as Kakashi continuously picked on Gai who couldn't find a retaliation that was up to caliber. However, the most entertaining thing to watch was Asuma as he did small things for Kurenai like get napkins if she spilled something.

_Those two are going to get married_, Tsuru predicted in her mind.

She looked over at Kakashi who still seemed to be preoccupied by Gai. Tsuru smiled and wondered if things were different how different would they be?

After a while, the five decided it was time to go. Asuma and Kurenai were going to get dinner together, but refused the notion that it bore any resemblance of a date. Gai unnecessarily announced that he was going to train until moonrise.

"What will you two do?" Asuma asked Kakashi and Tsuru suggestively.

"What do you mean?" Kakashi glared at the man.

"Oh nothing," Asuma smirked devilishly.

Tsuru was amused by Kakashi's flustered reactions and thought it would be funny to play it up a little. So, she grabbed Kakashi's hand.

"Why don't we go on our second date?" Kakashi wasn't really sure if Tsuru was teasing him or being serious.

"Wait-" Kakashi didn't get the chance to protest when Tsuru tugged on the hand she held dragging him in a different direction.

Tsuru only made a few strides when she fell. To others it looked like she had tripped over nothing at all.

"You okay?" Kakashi asked concerned. He had seen this happen twice already.

"Of course!" she claimed so sure. Then she realized that there was little feeling in her feet and legs. Tsuru let out a nervous laugh.

"C'mon," she whispered to herself. Slowly feelings of panic and utter humiliation sunk her heart to her stomach. "No, no, no, no."

The look on Tsuru's face was unforgettable. It was the same look that many of his victims and enemies had when faced with his very own chidori.

"Let us help you," Kakashi said reaching out only for his hand to be violently swatted away.

"No!" Tsuru yelled desperately trying to use her weak arms to pull herself up from the ground. "Move! Please! Move!"

Her cry ripped through the air. It's always hard to watch those you care about and find precious suffer. Kurenai, Asuma, Gai, and Kakashi stood stunned as emotions progressively poured out of her. Banging on her legs trying to get them to move, Tsuru was in a state of panic and humiliation. She hated herself and they saw it. It tore as if their hearts were made of paper.

Tsuru was admitted into the hospital once more for treatment.


	7. Chapter 7

Often times, in order to conform and be what most consider normal, we hide our pain and suffering. In order to not be a burden to everyone else, we'll bottle up everything we have inside until something tips over and we reach our limit. That's what happened to Tsuru that day. She had ignored and pushed aside the fact that her condition had been declining. Instead of staying at the hospital after her incident a few weeks before, she begged to be released for the sake of her mental health. Her own selfishness had brought Kakashi and Hyo back into the hospital.

"Will she be okay?" Kakashi asked Hyo.

The rest of the group had gone home leaving Kakashi and Hyo in the hospital lobby. Tsuru had received emergency treatment and was asleep. Hyo planned on staying until her woke up.

"I don't know," Hyo admitted. "You never know with these things. Last time it took her a full month to recover. Who knows how long it'll take her this time or if she'll even be able to walk again."

Kakashi remained quiet.

"Kakashi-senpai. You can go home, you know?"

He was silent again, but Hyo knew his answer.

"I see," Hyo whispered. "You're really good to her and I'm grateful."

"Thanks," Kakashi replied unsure of his own repsonse.

"Have you asked Tsuru nee-san what her dream is yet?"

"No, I haven't had the chance."

"Well her dream is to become a mother. She want's to have a nice family with a _lover_ and two kids. I have to use generic terms like 'lover' or 'spouse' because if I say 'husband' she flips out at me and says in that voice of hers 'I could very much fall in love and have children with a woman!'"

"Sounds like her."

"Who knows what our parents would have thought if they knew their precious daughter was this way. Even I don't know how to deal with it or what to tell her. At first I thought it was because she was sick, having an existential crisis, and just wanted to experiment; but she's actually very firm in her values."

Hyo reached into her weapon pouch and pulled out the keychain of a black cat with a golden bell attached to it. Kakashi was immediately reminded of his bell test back when he was starting out with a team of his own. How back then he was stuck in such old fashioned values that ended up costing the lives of those he held closest to his heart.

"Tsuru nee-san gave this to me the day we saw you and Tenzo-senpai," Hyo explained. "I kind of thought she bought it to give to you or something. Ever since she went on that one date with you, she never stopped talking about you, Kakashi-senpai. Wondering where you were or what you were up to."

It finally struck Kakashi maybe only maybe his own frankly foreign feelings weren't just one way. Had he not been an attentive person to begin with, he might have almost missed the blush on Hyo's face.

"Even still," Hyo started to say, "I was wondering-"

"Hyo-chan!" a sudden voice broke through the stale air of the hospital.

The voice came from a shinobi around Hyo's age. Judging from the way he addressed her, the man must have been a former teammate or classmate of Hyo's.

"Oh," Hyo seemed disappointed with being cut off. "Haruto."

"The Hokage is requesting us for a mission," he informed before noticing Kakashi. "K-K-Kakashi Hatake-san!"

Haruto bowed before his superior.

"There's no need to be so polite," Kakashi reassured.

"Sorry, Hatake-san," Haruto apologized bowing once more.

"Well," Hyo jumped up from her seat, "I guess I'm off. Though I would've liked to see Tsuru nee-san."

"Don't worry," Kakashi smiled at the younger woman. "I'll stay here and make sure she's okay."

There was a strange look in Hyo's eyes before she smiled and thanked him. He watched inquisitively as Hyo left the hospital with her teammate.

Kakashi waited for another half an hour when a nurse finally came up to him stating that Tsuru was awake. He made his way to to her room and slid her door open to see her looking out her window.

"Kakashi-kun," she greeted not taking her eyes off of the outside view. "Where's Hyo-chan?"

"She was here, but got called in for a mission," Kakashi explained.

"I see," she remained still.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm alright."

"Tsuru-"

"I'm sorry, Kakashi." She finally faced him with that smile of her's. That sweet smile that in the moment looked terribly in pain. "I must have cause you and your friends a lot of trouble and for that I'm sorry."

She paused for a moment and continued, "It might take me a while to be able to walk again, but I haven't lost it yet! I'm going to start physical therapy tomorrow and hopefully-"

"Stop," Kakashi demanded.

Tsuru wasn't one to obey such a command, "Why?"

"This isn't you."

"There you go again, thinking you know me. If this isn't me then what is?"

Kakashi didn't really know why he said what he said. All that he was sure of that whatever Tsuru was doing or thinking wasn't herself. He felt that she needed to be screaming and crying. Pouring out her feelings of humiliation and suffering. But he understood how she felt so well. The need to hide. Because of precisely that, Kakashi didn't know what else to say. In a way, he thought he was watching his own reflection.

"It doesn't matter," Tsuru murmured. "None of it matters. Go home, Kakashi-kun. Thanks for your concern, but it's all fine now."

Kakashi did as he was told and left the room. Immediately Kakashi felt urge to barge back into the room and scold her for holding back her feelings from him; but that would be hypocritical of him, wouldn't it? So he suppressed his desires and walked back into the lobby of the hospital.

There he saw another ANBU waiting for him in full uniform.

"The Hokage is asking for you," the man said.

That's right. Kakashi was a shinobi of Konoha. His priority lies with the wellbeing of the village as a whole. It was his duty to protect his own home and those precious to him. There was no time or space for anything else but that. He didn't want to lose anyone else and falling in love with someone whose fate was death was ridiculous.

Kakashi kneeled before the Sandaime.

"You asked for me," Kakashi addressed.

"Yes," the Sandaime nodded. "I apologize for taking away your day off."

"Anything if it's for the sake of the village."

"If I'm correct, you've been spending quite some time with a girl by the name of Tsuru."

"I suppose you could say that."

"Mm," the Sandaime breathed out a puff of smoke. "I have received intel that there is a traitor among a team I sent out not long ago on a mission. Their mission was to deliver an important scroll to strengthen the peace we've only recently established between Iwagakure and Konohagakure. I want you to trail this team and eliminate the traitor."

"Of course," Kakashi said. "Do you know who the traitor might be?"

"She goes by the name of Hyo."


	8. Chapter 8

Of course it would be something like this was going to happen. It was rare for a ninja to live a quiet life when they were pawns used directly in the game of war and politics. It was in the moment he found himself tracing Tsuru's younger sister waiting from the moment to strike that Kakashi remembered who he really was. Not just a shinobi of Konoha or an ANBU Black Ops captain. A trained assassin. A killer that murdered on command.

It was a sensitive time in politics. Wounds from the war were fresh and there still those who desired revenge. Minds were still impressionable. Even in Konoha there were those who wished to continue war to fulfill their vengeance on those who took the life of a loved one. Kakashi didn't imagine that Hyo might be one of those people. Then again, people are unpredictable and quick to act on their emotions.

He stalked the team of four silently as they rushed through the woods with Hyo at the lead. She must have been assigned as captain of the mission. Hyo looked confident and suited the role well. Kakashi couldn't help but let his mind wander to Tsuru and he wondered what kind of kunoichi Tsuru might have been.

The team stopped near the border of the Fire Country when they came upon a foreign woman wearing an Iwagakure headband. She stood on the other side of the border.

"Konoha shinobi," she announced with her hands up. "I come in peace. I was instructed by our Tsuchikage to pick up the scroll myself here at the border between lands. You will hand it over peacefully, otherwise our nation will take it as a sign that Konoha is willing to go to war."

"Captain," one of Hyo's subordinates said. "What should we do?"

A strange smirk appeared on Hyo's face as she asnwered, "We turn it over."

This was Kakashi's cue, but Hyo was good and deserving of the title jonin. She had thrown a smoke bomb that appeared to have a powerful sleeping draft, knocking out her teammates. Luckily, Kakashi hid himself underground avoiding the tainted smoke.

Without time to spare he left the sleeping bodies and chased after the two missing women. As long as they were behind the border, they would be safe. The main priority was to get the scroll back and eliminate the Iwa kunoichi and Hyo.

"I didn't expect the captain to be the traitor," the Iwa kunoichi said to Hyo. "But I guess that's pretty smart, huh? Captain is the least suspicious position."

"I suppose so," Hyo replied with a smile.

"We need to destroy this scroll somewhere," the kunoichi noted. "There are some important signatures and as long as those don't reach the village, Iwagakure will go back to war with Konoha. Such fools you Konoha shinobi are. So naive."

"Shouldn't we stop and destroy it?" Hyo questioned. "We're safely across the border after all."

"Don't tell me you haven't noticed it yet," the kunoichi was slightly taken aback. "Are you sure you're a jonin? We're being followed and he's fast. We need to regroup with others or take the guy down before anything else."

Hyo wasn't a sensory type like Tsuru was and had little talent for it. It would have been nice if Tsuru had never been sick and they could have been partners in this wretched life. At least they would have had each other's backs in such moments of difficulty.

"He's catching up," the kunoichi informed.

"Wrong," Kakashi's voice was cool. While Hyo was talented, she wasn't a genius like Kakashi was and certainly nowhere near as fast. "I'm right here."

Right then Hyo pushed her fist into the side of the Iwa kunoichi's face who lost grip of scroll.

Hyo caught the scroll then called out to Kakashi, "Oi Anbu-san, let's go!"

It was just as he thought. The began running in the opposite direction back towards the border.

"I was informed that you were the traitor," Kakashi commented as they rushed from one branch to the next. "How can I trust you?"

"Because the real traitor is going to reveal himself," Hyo noted slightly vexed. "You ANBU folk are more careless than I thought. You must not have counted the bodies that were left when I released that smoke bomb. On top of that, you weren't the ninja that kunoichi was sensing."

"You let yourself be the traitor and you let yourself get caught to drag out the real one."

"I knew the Sandaime would send an ANBU," Hyo noted. "But we can't afford to have any deaths on our account at this time. I want to know who it is and take them back for questioning."

"So you even predicted me showing up," Kakashi noted. "I underestimated you."

"It's fine. But it won't be long when the traitor does show themselves and I doubt they'll be alone."

Hyo was right, soon the two were surrounded by a group of Iwa ninja and one bore the Konoha hitae-ate. It was none other than Haruto who had shown up at the hospital earlier that day.

"So it was you," Hyo didn't seemed phased at all that her own teammate betrayed her. "Why'd you do it?"

"Well we do things like this because we think we won't get caught," Haruto chuckled. "I guess I was a fool for trying to trick you, Hyo-chan."

"But why?"

"Because we think war is this terrible thing," Haruto responded, "but the truth is that Konoha flourished during the war and Danzo-sama knows that."

"So Danzo-sama put you up to this," Kakashi said.

"Yeah," Haruto said. "And the two of you will die here."

Kakashi and Hyo, who still hadn't realized who the ANBU was, braced themselves. They were outnumbered five to two, but Hyo had faith in Kakashi the Copy Ninja. Steadily, they took down one enemy after the next until there were just three left including Haruto.

The sound of kunai knives and shuriken clashed against one another. Hyo struck down another Iwa ninja as Kakashi took the life of another. Enemy blood splattered onto them both. The two noticed that something was off and Haruto was missing.

Hyo fell down to one knee, it seemed that her chakra was running low. Kakashi estimated that he had just enough chakra for one more chidori but that was it. Any further use of his Sharingan would be detrimental.

"Where'd that fucker go," Hyo panted.

"Right here."

Tsuru felt a little guilty for kicking Kakashi out when he was just trying to help. She wrestled with her own mind going back and forth from blaming Kakashi then blaming herself then back to Kakashi. He was the only person who ever got her so riled up. He had an annoying way of making her reveal her all her worst and unattractive parts.

"Maybe I should just ugly cry and annoy him to death," Tsuru said to herself in a huff. "That'll teach him! Or maybe I should actually apologize…"

It was much past dinner time and the night had come. There wasn't much to do in the hospital especially without her legs. Many of the medics and nurses had gone home, and she didn't feel like pestering the tired ones that work overnight shifts.

A breeze blew through the window and the sound of of a bell reached Tsuru's ears. She looked over at her nightstand and smiled as she picked up the keychain of the white cat.

_That's right, _Tsuru thought. _I'll just have to ask Hyo-chan what to do about Kakashi. She'll know what to do. _

Lightning from Kakashi's hand punched right through Haruto's chest, but he was too late. Kakashi felt Hyo's blood dripping onto the back of his neck. Haruto had succeeded in putting a kunai right into her heart the moment before Kakashi's chidori hit.

The two bodies fell over in thumps. Immediately Kakashi rushed to Hyo's side and removed his mask.

"Heh," Hyo weakly laughed. "I guessed it might have been you, Kakashi-senpai."

Her voice was nothing more than a croak.

"I'm not going to make it," she said. Hyo grabbed Kakashi's hand and placed an object in it. The man opened his palm to see the keychain Tsuru had given her sister. "Take it and take care of Tsuru nee-san."

Hyo's gray eyes grew dull and distant as she looked to the sky one last time.

"I guess I'm going before you," Hyo said. "Don't rush after me, nee-san."

Just like that Kakashi watched as Hyo passed.

Kakashi could barely look at her the next morning. While his face didn't show it, his heart wrenched as the words left his mouth and reached Tsuru's ears. That hurt, pain, confusion, sorrow, panic flowing through her. God, did she not know that it hurt him too? And it hurt more to see her like that. Tsuru dug her fingers into his vest and buried her face into his bodied and screamed.

Shinobi Rule No. 25 states that a shinobi must never show their tears. And that's how Kakashi was trained.


	9. Chapter 9

It was officially autumn in Konoha. You could tell because even though the sun was high in the sky, the air was cool. A strange sort of day for a funeral.

Tsuru wore a grey coat over her black dress as she sat in her wheelchair. Kakashi stood behind the chair since Tsuru had made a fuss about not wanting a stranger medic attending the funeral of his little sister. Kakashi guessed that it made her feel more helpless than she already was, so he offered to help instead to which she reluctantly agreed. After all, it was better than a random person showing up to the funeral.

In all honesty, Kakashi thought that Tsuru would cry during the service, but her face was dry and still. Even through the gossiping whispers that asked what Tsuru would do without her sister, she remained motionless.

"What will she do without her sister?"

"Right? She doesn't have a family or a boyfriend."

"That's really unfortunate especially since her condition has declined. She's even in a wheelchair."

"I wonder how much longer she has to live?"

Despite it not being his concern, Kakashi couldn't help but carelessly throw glares around.

The ceremony came to a close and it left just Kakashi and Tsuru before Hyo's memorial. The two were uncannily quiet, but Kakashi's mind buzzed with the voices of people who murmured about Tsuru's fate.

"Don't worry about it Kakashi-kun," Tsuru said catching onto his behavior. "I'll be admitted into a program that deals with people like me. Those whose relatives served this village and perished tragically leaving the ones who need to be cared for behind."

"And you're okay with that?" Kakashi's voice was challenging.

"I don't think I have much of a choice," she said back.

There were noticeable bags underneath her stormy eyes and the tip of her small nose was red from the cold air. Kakashi knelt down in front of her with a handkerchief in hand and pinched her nose with the cloth. Tsuru was unmoving. Kakashi had hoped to see her flustered again. To see the life rise in her cheeks.

"What if I volunteered to help?" Kakashi vocalized his wonder.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you could stay with me instead of being holed up in the hospital."

Alas, her stormy eyes lit up dimly.

"I-I couldn't do that. " Tsuru stutterred. "Besides, you're Kakashi Hatake of the Sharingan. The famed Copy Ninja. And I'm nothing more than a sick woman. There would be controversy and a lot of gossip. Thank you for your kindness, but I'm going to have to reject your offer."

For a moment, Kakashi was stunned. Perhaps he thought, based on the little number of women he knew, Tsuru would jump at the very offer. He could've protested and asked her to take the absurd offer into consideration once more, but Kakashi laughed instead.

"Sorry," he said. "I must be a fool. After all it's not like you're my girlfriend or anything."

"Would you want me to be your girlfriend?"

The two looked at each other with eyes that they couldn't read.

"No," Tsuru excused herself looking down into her lap. "Don't answer that. I was just joking. It wouldn't be right of me."

"What do you mean?"

Tsuru buried her face in her hands, "I'm so selfish, Kakashi-kun. I knew how she felt, but I denied it because I like you."

"Hyo loved you," Tsuru furthered her explanation. "She's looked up to you for so long. I knew your name and who you were because she'd talk about you all the time. How you once had a mission with her back when she was a chunin. How you wouldn't ever leave a teammate behind. Honestly, she knew so much more about you than I do now.

Yet, I still denied her a chance with you because I wanted you to myself."

Tsuru rubbed her eyes with her forearm as she wept.

"Hyo-chan," she began to hiccup. "I'm so sorry. I was a bad older sister to you. I made you suffer more than you had to. I hope you find rest and peace."

At the moment, Tsuru's confession was something that flew over his head. He didn't care much for the feelings that were verbally being returned to him. Kakashi didn't see a woman who loved him but a woman whose worst fears had come true. Someone who had been left behind by those she relied on so desperately. Now, Tsuru would have to find a way to fend for herself in life. It was cruel thing that God was putting her through and a cruel image for anyone to see.

In an effort, Kakashi reached into his pocket remembering the object that Hyo had given him in her final moments. Tsuru heard the delicate sound of the bell.

"I think she wanted me to give this back to you," Kakashi said holding out the cat charm.

Tsuru sniffled and gently slapped her palm to her forehead. A sudden giggle escaped her lips contradictory the steady flow of tears streaming down from her eyes.

"I don't think you were listening to me, Kakashi-kun," she laughed solemnly. "Hyo-chan liked you. If she handed it to you and you aren't sure if she wanted me to have it, then it's meant for you."

Kakashi's one visible eye widened slightly in surprise at Tsuru's words.

"Even if it really was Hyo-chan's intention to give that back to me," Tsuru furthered, "I want you to have it."

The blonde woman wrapped her hand around Kakashi's that held the childish keychain. She closed his palm and pushed it back to him indicating that she really wanted him to have this cheap yet precious memento of her deceased sister.

Tsuru proceeded to lift her face to look up at the sky. The afternoon sky was a soft pale blue and the light yellow sun felt warm against her face despite the chill of autumn.

"The weather's so strange," Tsuru said. "I guess it just shows that sunny days can be sad too."

"Yeah," Kakashi agreed turning his attention in a similar direction as Tsuru's.

While they were out, Kakashi and Tsuru roamed the streets of Konoha picking up lunch from street vendors and various restuarants that they could take back to the hospital. They picked an assortment of dumplings, sushi rolls, and dango. Things that Kakashi wouldn't normally eat in order to maintain his fitness, but were things that appealed to Tsuru.

Soon they found themselves back at the hospital where Kakashi gave Tsuru a few minutes to change back into hospital wear. He noticed her particular distaste of the plain white clothes that day.

"I just went from boring all black clothes to even worse all white," Tsuru cursed under her breath."

The two settled and spread out the food. Kakashi ate with his back turned not wishing to reveal his true face. A move Tsuru did not seem to question.

"Kakashi-kun?" Tsuru called out to him.

"Mm?" Kakashi let out not turning away from his food.

"Do you think, we could still go on that second date?"

Kakashi paused for just a moment, slightly thrown off by the nonchalant request.

"Yeah," he replied. "Why not? When would you want to go?"

"Right now." she answered with conviction.

Kakashi almost spat out the streamed beef dumpling he had just popped into his mouth.

"There's something I've always wanted to do," she explained. "It's something that Hyo never let me do when she was around."

"If Hyo didn't let you do it, then what would make you think I would?"

"Because."

"Because?"

"Just because."

"That's not an answer."

Tsuru piqued Kakashi's curiosity. The two snuck out of the hospital like they had done before. Kakashi pushed Tsuru on a wheelchair through the streets of Konoha. He thought that she looked funny with her stylish gray coat over her pajama-like outfit. For once, he didn't think about where he was going and let Tsuru take the lead. After all, it was something she wanted.

"Just keep going straight," she directed.

Finally, they reached the destination. Kakashi raised an eyebrow as he looked up at the carved faces of the four Hokages of Konoha.

"I want to go up there and look at the village from above!" Tsuru announced excitedly.

"Okay," Kakashi said. "Get on my back, I'll take you."

"No!" Tsuru protested.

_God, she's stubborn_, Kakashi sighed to himself.

"Well, how else do you propose on getting up all these steps?" Kakashi retorted. "Wait Tsuru-"

Tsuru stepped on the break of her wheelchair and slowly propped herself up so that she stood on her own two feet. She took a shaky step forward on her own. Then another. And another. And another until she reached the railing of the steps.

"I'm going to walk up the stairs," Tsuru looked at Kakashi with a set of starry eyes. "I won't stop until I've reached the top!"

Kakashi was taken aback by Tsuru's sudden determination and already established foolishness. He sighed and placed himself right behind Tsuru. His hand gently pressed into Tsuru's spine.

"Let me at least help you a little," Kakashi offered.

"Okay!"

It was a long way up. Kakashi stayed right behind matching Tsuru's painfully slow pace. If she fell, he would catch her before she hit the ground. By the time they had reached the halfway point, Tsuru was sweating and panting.

"I could just jump up, you know?" Kakashi noted with concern.

"I'm going to do this!" Tsuru claimed with as much determination as exhaustion.

He let her continue her journey, but worried as her knees were shaking and clearly not meant to be doing such physical labor. Kakashi strongly felt that he should be stopping her, but she rejected it all. The urge to just scoop her into his arms and shoot up to the top was so tempting, but he couldn't do that to her.

The sun was beginning to set and they had perhaps a another quarter to cover. By this point, Tsuru was moving off of pure determination. She looked as though she would faint. Kakashi finally decided enough is enough and slid himself under one arm.

"Lean on me," Kakashi said to Tsuru. "We'll walk up together."

It was a brilliant compromise and Tsuru couldn't refuse.

She shifted her whole body weight onto the larger man and he dragged her the rest of the way up.

"Congratulations," he said letting Tsuru sit on the ground. "I'm proud of you."

That tinge of pink on her cheeks never got old. Kakashi sat down next to the blushing beauty.

"I didn't really climb up the whole way on my own though," Tsuru said disappointed.

"You had a mission and you completed it. It was a success."

"Yeah but-"

"In the ninja world, we are taught that the mission always comes first. Before friends, comrades, and even family. But some very important people in my life taught me that those who abandon their friends are scum."

Tsuru turned to look at Kakashi with those big, glistening eyes.

"I helped a friend in need to complete a mission."

Kakashi's eyes closed and curved to reveal a smile. Tsuru had never seen him smile like that before and it made her heart flutter and race. He looked so good. Flawless. The monument they climbed was no more than a blissful stroll for him. In the back of her mind she was panicked as she realized that she must have looked terrible. Sweaty and weak; in her hospital clothes; dark circles under her eyes from the funeral; messy hair.

"Look," Kakashi pointed outwards. Tsuru's eyes widened as the sun set and the lights of the village came on. It was a beautiful vision of her home that she couldn't believe she hadn't seen in her entire life.

Sweaty and weak; in her hospital clothes; dark circles; and messy hair. Tsuru had never looked so imperfectly perfect. The determination and childlike wonder in her eyes. The sheer unwillingness to give up and perservere. Kakashi had a new found respect for her.

Kakashi carried Tsuru back down and put her back in the wheelchair where she actually fell asleep. He laughed to himself and started back towards the hospital.

Kakashi snuck the two back in. Everything was where they had left before meaning no one had even noticed they were gone. He carried a soundly sleeping Tsuru in his arms and laid her down on the bed. She looked so at peace with her eyes closed.

"Kakashi-kun," Tsuru blinked awake.

"What is it?"

"Thank you. I had a good second date."

"I did too."

"Really? That's good to hear."

Tsuru sat up in her bed as Kakashi cleared away the remnants of their lunch from before. She rubbed her eyes indicating her tiredness.

"Go to sleep," Kakashi said. "You've had a long day."

"No," she protested again weakly.

"Is that all you know how to say?"

"No…I just want to spend time with you."

Kakashi threw away the last piece of trash and walked up to Tsuru. His heart was beating fast. At twenty-three, he had never really experienced these feelings before. His only experiences had been short, brief, and purely physical; but this was much different and he didn't know what he was doing.

Tsuru felt Kakashi grab her chin and turn her face. She didn't much time to observe, but Kakashi had removed his hitae-ate and mask. Both eyes were open and revealed the ever famed Sharingan. Then his lips were on her's.

They moved their lips together for short while before Kakashi pulled away too soon. He locked his mismatched eyes with her's.

He whispered, "Sleep."

Kakashi kissed Tsuru briefly once more and let her slip into a blissful oblivion. Tsuru was graced with the best dreams that night. She saw the smiling face of Hyo and their parents as Tsuru stood beside two children. Her own children made from her own blood. However, Tsuru had to remind herself upon waking that dreams live in a realm of fiction and fantasy. For her, such aspirations could never come true.


	10. Chapter 10

Immature. Absolutely, utterly, despicably immature. That's was all Tsuru could think about a week after Hyo's funeral. Three days after Kakashi had kissed her. Wasn't he the one who had offered to take her in and help her in Hyo's stead? Where was he now? Yet, it seemed typical of Kakashi to forget to inform Tsuru that he was going on a mission.

There weren't many people Tsuru talked to these days. Especially now that Hyo was gone. It was now more than ever she needed somebody there by her side, helping her through this time when her entire existence felt empty. Absolutely, utterly, despicably alone.

Tsuru's world without Hyo was noticeably more empty. How could Kakashi be so selfish to take what he wants when Tsuru needed someone there for her? Was she that much of a lost cause? Perhaps, it just wasn't worth the pursuit for answers.

"Tsuru-san," a nurse called her name. "It's time for your physical."

"Another one?" Tsuru questioned. "But I just had one last week."

"We have send weekly updates to the new hospital we're moving you to," the nurse informed, "so that they can be prepared to treat you properly."

"Right."

What had he done? What on Earth had come over Kakashi? Every time he thought about kissing Tsuru made him want to throw himself out of a window for being so foolish. Love wasn't something Kakashi deserved and no one should be subject to be with a failure like himself. His very name could bring danger to anyone that is close to him. Kakashi Hatake was a name recorded in bingo books since he was fourteen. No one was safe around him and that's why he would keep such distance from others.

Though, he had to admit it was cruel of him to not even tell her of all the endless missions that rolled in one after another. Especially in a critical time such as this. However, Kakashi would be lying if he said that he wasn't avoiding Tsuru.

Everything about her made him ache. She was painfully beautiful and painfully kind. Painfully bright and all, but he knew that it was all going to die. It hurt to be around her. Perhaps it was unfair to force both her and himself into such a situation. Or was this selfish as well?

"Kakashi-senpai?" Kakashi's close subordinate called out to him.

"What is it, Tenzou?" Kakashi responded.

"You're just acting a bit strange today," Tenzou replied.

"Am I? How so?"

"You're just strange and a little out of it today."

"I am?"

"See, just like that."

"What's strange about it?"

Tenzo sighed. It was hard enough to get properly across to Kakashi, but today his captain was not making anything easier. Their day was technically rather lax with training, formation planning, and village surveillance. However, it's always a lot for ANBU who don't really get time off or even a good night's rest. Maybe all this was getting to Kakashi.

"Leave taichou be," one of the other ANBU said out loud. "Rumor has it, he's been seeing a girl. Probably just relationship issues."

"Kakashi-senpai?" Tenzo gasped in disbelief. "You have a girlfriend?"

"No," Kakashi answered sternly. "I do not. Don't believe in petty village rumors. Besides, we're ANBU which means such trivial things would only get in our way."

"Sorry," the other ANBU apologized laughing. "I didn't mean to offend you. I just wanted to let you know that I was happy for you. People like us still deserve to be human despite our pathetic and filthy lives. But if you say that it's not anything, then I'll take your word over anything else."

The ANBU left leaving Tenzo wondering about his captain's private life. While he had been with Kakashi for a number of years now, he had only really cracked the surface of the mysterious Kakashi Hatake. Tenzo could understand his often distant and aloof attitude, but never really knew what was going on inside Kakashi's head. So, Tenzou uncharacteristically decided to pry a little farther.

"If there are rumors that you are seeing a girl," Tenzou began, "then there must still be someone new who you consider a friend."

Kakashi surprisingly found himself answering, "Perhaps people are referring to a now deceased comrade's sister."

Kakashi kind of liked talking about Tsuru.

"Does she have a name?" Tenzou inquired curiously. Never before had he seen such a soft look in his captain's eyes.

"What's the use in telling?" Kakashi questioned back before mumbling just audibly. "Even if there was something, it's over now."

"What does that mean?"

"Our generation has already seen enough bloodshed from those we care most about; and in the life of a shinobi, there's only bound to be more pain and guilt…"

Kakashi's tone was solemn and Tenzo looked at his captain with a blank expression.

He continued, "Our job as ANBU is to make sure no one sees and no feels imminent danger when in fact, Konoha is always on its toes. Civilians and other shinobi know nothing of our duties and just how deep the secrets go. It's our job to hide all of this not only because information could end up in the wrong hands, but to protect this village. And perhaps, that's the ANBU's Will of Fire.

C'mon, Tenzo. It's time for our mission."

Not all missions were so brutal, but they often were. As ANBU, the whole group had become desensitized to killing and taking down one human after another. Blood splattered their white masks, onto the trees, and on the ground. Blood dripped from the ends of their katanas. Blood soaked through Kakashi's gloves as fist surrounding by lightning pierced through the enemy's heart.

He thought that every time he took another life with that jutsu, it would nullify the hurt from _that one incident. _Kakashi would then proceed to think about the ritual he'd have to go through to revive his gloves. How he would have to run it through water and soap to draw out as much blood as possible before running it through the wash.

"I think you got the last of them," Tenzo praised their leader. "You really are amazing, taichou."

"There's nothing really amazing about being 'Cold-Blooded Kakashi,'" Kakashi remarked.

When assassination missions were more regular in the week, that meant that everyone got to go home at more regular times at a regular rate. It was typically in these times Kakashi would feel very lonely yet very unwilling to confide in his friends. After all, these missions were extremely confidential and sensitive. So, by the time Kakashi was nineteen, he learned from his upperclassmen and captains what they referred to as "humanly needs" which would help blow off some steam. Kakashi's first time was truthfully more awkward than he wanted to admit and he couldn't precisely find the pleasure in sex. However, it wasn't long until he found the addicting qualities of women's bodies.

Within the time that he knew Tsuru, Kakashi realized that he actually held himself back from such urges. It had been quite a while that he suddenly felt a need for fleeting partnership. Kakashi would be lying if the thought of sleeping with Tsuru hadn't attempted to cross his mind before. However, something felt morally wrong about thinking about having sex with a woman who seemed to play on the edge of death.

So that night he found himself back in his own tiny apartment with a brunette with a full body. His headband was wrapped around the woman's face to prevent her from seeing the entirety of his face. The woman he chose to be with today looked awfully familiar, but pushed all past thoughts aside. The scent of alcohol hung heavily between wet kisses.

Two large bags were neatly packed away in the corner of Tsuru's room. In the morning, two ninja would be assigned to escort Tsuru to a secluded medical facility. The location of this hospital was kept secret from most in case of emergency and was well guarded. Typically if a pair of ninja were sent once as escorts, they should be expected to be reused.

Tsuru sat still confused about the man who had kissed her the night before and why he wasn't coming at all. She expected him to at least sneak in through the window like a teenager and tell her about how grueling his day was. Tsuru liked seeing Kakashi grow lighter around her. She knew that she could never fully comprehend the constant pressure to survive; but that didn't mean that she couldn't be there to be of comfort to him.

No. Indeed, in any case with Tsuru there could only be one ending. It was selfish of her to expect that any person would stay beside her through her illness especially when death was so certain. Kakashi was like any other man she had met in her life, but Tsuru couldn't find it in her heart to blame any of them.

Daybreak came and Tsuru found herself looking back at the village she grew up in. While she hoped that one day she would come back home, Tsuru knew that her life lacked certainty.

"Tsuru-san," it was the voice of one of Kakashi's friends, Asuma who had been assigned to guiding Tsuru to the remote hospital along with two other medic ninjas. "We should get going. It's quite a trip for someone in your condition."

"Right," Tsuru whipsred solemnly.

Asuma took note of the her appearance and said, "If you get tired, let us know so we can carry you."

"I'll be fine, but thank you."

The responses were a bit unlike the lively Tsuru. Boisterous and loud. However, the girl had been through much in the past week or so particularly with the loss of Hyo. The group got moving and started walking through the woods in directions that Tsuru couldn't really comprehend. The winding walking was clearly intentional.

"Did you get to say your goodbyes?" Asuma asked trying to take Tsuru's mind off of the strange road.

"There's not many people to say goodbye to," Tsuru responded despondently.

"What about Kakashi?" Asuma asked unknowingly. "You two seemed pretty close."

"Oh, were we? I suppose so. He's just so busy and all." Tsuru pretended that everything was fine.

"Honestly," Asuma started, "we're all really grateful that you came into Kakashi's life. He's been through some dark things and it was nice to see him take his mind off of that darkness. Even if it was just a little bit."

Tsuru smiled softly masking her mixed feelings.

"I hope you get better quickly," Asuma noted brightly, "so you can come back faster!"

It wasn't much longer that they came up on their destination. It was a beautiful location that was almost as well guarded as the infamous Blood Prison. Varieties of plants and flowers bloomed as they pleased and as they should in nature. Pinks, whites, blues, and yellows tangled with purples, oranges, and lots of greens. There were tall hills and the soft sound of a flowing creek could be heard nearby. The hospital itself was small, but polished and white.

Tsuru thanked Asuma for his help and kindness with a light hug. For a second, Asuma regretted his prior optimism as he momentarily put a hand on her bones. He was well aware that her current condition was exponentially declining. Only a miracle could save her now.

"Is there anything else I can do for you?" Asuma offered. "You're probably in good hands, but-"

"No, thank you," Tsuru smiled through strings of tears.

Asuma made his way back to the village with a heavy heart. The day was grey and brooding. Weather reports claimed that there would be rain for the next few days starting tomorrow. Maybe he would spend some time with Kurenai.

The Hokage's son walked pensively through the streets until he saw all too grim and familiar face of Kakashi Hatake who was sitting on a bench reading a book. It then hit Asuma that Tsuru had admitted she hadn't said her goodbyes to him.

"Hey!" Asuma called out to his colleague and friend. "Kakashi!"

"Asuma?" came Kakashi.

"A slow day for you?" Asuma asked.

"I guess," Kakashi replied enigmatically as he turned a page.

"You haven't seen Tsuru lately right?" Asuma saw Kakashi freeze momentarily.

"No."

"I see… Well, I'm sure she would've have wanted to say goodbye."

This grabbed Kakashi's attention.

"What?" Kakashi asked.

"She left," Asuma answered solemnly. "Kakashi, she's not well and without her sister, Tsuru's going to need better attention."

"Oh," Asuma was slightly taken aback at his peer's aloof response.

"Aren't you upset that she didn't say anything to you before leaving?" Asuma pressed.

"I knew it was coming," Kakashi replied. In a way, Kakashi was relieved that he didn't have to face the girl any longer. The physical distance could be provide as a means to forget her and the guilt that had been weighing him down.

Not allowing Asuma to pester him any further, Kakashi said, "I have business to take care of now. I'll see you around."

"Kakashi-" the annoyance in Asuma's voice was clear, but Kakashi wasn't going to have any of it. So he did what he always did when he didn't want to deal with such trivial things, he walked away.


	11. Chapter 11

Tsuru laid in her bed listening to the clock tick by. Seconds would turn to minutes. Minutes into hours. Hours into days. Days into weeks. Weeks into months. Months into years. It was a disorienting feeling being in this stale and sterile place. It was as if time didn't move yet each withering moment passed by so quickly. Just when you think it's only been moments since you woke up, night has already fallen.

The colors. Even though life was abundant with wildlife outside, within the windows and doors there could only be the same white. It was here Tsuru decided that if she were to ever get married, her wedding dress would have to be a different color. Maybe red. Maybe blue? Anything but this sick, stale white. Even a creamier shade would want to make her vomit.

"Tsuru-san!" a nurse called.

_Finally_, Tsuru exclaimed to herself.

Kakashi sat in a tree reading _Icha Icha Paradise_ as new batch of genin practices their shuriken throwing. He took his teaching job in a relaxed manner. Much had changed the last three years and Kakashi found himself in more mellow place. Although he could do without all the clamor caused by his three subordinates. Surprisingly, this morning was more quiet than others.

"Quit showing off Sasuke!" a small yellow-haired boy yelled at his raven-headed teammate.

Quieter than _most_ mornings.

"Stop posting Sasuke-kun just because you can't the move. Naruto!" A pink haired girl feistily screamed at the blonde boy.

"Sakura-chan…" Naruto trailed off dejectedly.

Kakashi closed his orange book and sighed before jumping down to rejoin his group.  
He stood tall over the preteens with a hand on his hip.

"It seems like you guys are getting a hang of the moves," Kakashi noted. "Why don't we stop for a lunch break before heading over to the Hokage's for our mission."

"Do you know what kind of mission we're going to get?" Naruto asked excitedly. "Man, I hope it's something dangerous!"

"You shouldn't hope for such a thing!" Sakura wacked Naruto over his head.

"Ow!" Naruto yelped. "I just want something other than community service or babysitting that's all!"

"This idiot does have a point," Sasuke surprisingly concurred.

"But Sasuke-kun…" Sakura's tone immediately flipped.

"Alright," Kakashi interjected not wanting to deal with any more conflict. "Get lunch and we'll all meet at the Hokage's office in about an hour, okay?"

Kakashi sat down at a tea shop relishing in his long awaited peace.

"What can I get you?" the young waitress asked him. She had tan skin, short dark brown hair, and a pair of glittering green eyes.

"Just some tea would be nice," Kakashi responded.

"Sure, anything else?" she asked almost suggestively with a thin brow raised.

"No, thank you."

Kakashi's polite yet blunt response seemed to create a small, barely noticeable pout on the waitress's face. Disappointed, she turned around to fulfill the order. On the other hand, Kakashi pulled out his book and bast his eyes down.

"Did you just reject that pretty lady?" came the voice of Asuma.

Could Kakashi ever get a moment of silence to finish his book?

"She never asked anything," Kakashi responded not taking his eyes off the pages begging to be read.

"Well she seems find you attractive," Asuma said taking seat across from Kakashi. "She can't take her eyes off of you."

Kakashi's sighed and turned around to see the waitress's eyes widen in panic and quickly turn around to pretend she wasn't looking in his general direction.

"What do you want, Asuma?" Kakashi asked.

"Just saw you come in and thought that I'd check up on a friend!"

"You're here for a reason."

"Okay, you've got me! Well, I was at the hospital because Ino had passed out from using her mind transfer jutsu and apparently she's also anemic. Well, she's fine now. But, I overheard the nurses talking about a patient who is supposed to be returning from rehabilitation. So, I went over and asked the lovely ladies about it. Turns out, Tsuru's coming back."

Kakashi turned a page in his book.

"Well?" Asuma asked.

Another page turn.

Asuma sighed, "Well, I thought you might want to know since you two were… well, whatever you two were's. Anyways, it's been a while since we've gotten the whole gang together. A lot of us are busy with our little genins, but the adults should get a chance to eat and drink. What do you say?"

Kakashi flipped over another page.

"Here's your tea," The waitress came back and placed a cup in front of Kakashi. "Could I get the friend anything?"

"Oh no," Asuma said rising from his seat. "I just wanted to say hi and I have to go now, but thanks! Kakashi, I hope to see you later!"

"No problem," she waved bye to Asuma as he walked out and turned her attention back to Kakashi who seemed very invested in his book. "So…"

Kakashi finally turned to look at the girl who blushed and began rock gently on her feet.

"I-I was wondering,"she started shyly, "you know. Um, my shift ends at 5 and I would love it if we could get dinner or something?"

The girl batted her lashes at him nervously waiting for an answer.

Kakashi sighed, "Maybe if I get your name, I could pick you up around 6."

Tsuru hoped it had been Asuma to pick her up again those years ago. Instead it was a random woman with dark hair in a messy updo and grayish brown eyes. She wore a knit fishnet shirt under a beige trench coat. Loud and boisterous enough to annoy even Tsuru who seemed to have calmed down due to the years alone in rehab. Apparently, the woman's name was Mitarashi Anko.

"Must feel nice finally be out of a place like that!" Anko said stretching her arms out like cat.

"Yea," Tsuru replied.

Anko raised a suspicious eyebrow. "You're not like you used to be."

"Excuse me? You know me?"

"Well of course, not personally. But you were quite the topic amongst the aunties when you started going out with Kakashi."

A sharpness pierced through Tsuru's heart. "We weren't going out."

Anko laughed heartily before saying, "You sure about that? I'd never seen Kakashi so puppy-dog around anyone except Rin!"

"Rin?" Tsuru asked, her interest was angrily piqued.

"Oh," Anko's tone went solemn. "He never told you."

"He never told me much about himself," Tsuru said. "Anyways, who's this Rin girl?"

"No one really!" Anko nervously brushed off the topic with a giggle.

"Doesn't really sound like 'no one,' Tsuru noted.

"Hey, do me a favor and if you see or talk to Kakashi, which I'm sure you will, don't mention that I mentioned her. He'll have my head for it!"

"Can't make any promises," Tsuru said under her breath.

Sharp fox eyes caught the words as fast as Anko spun soundlessly on her heels. Within a nano second, a the point of a kunai knife was at Tsuru's throat. Tsuru screeched in fear as two medics immediately jumped into action only to be kicked in the face by Anko's feet. Anko certainly was ranked special jonin for a reason.

"Hey look here," Anko threatened with a smile on her face. "Don't think for a second I won't do something horrible to you. These medical ninja, rank below me. Whatever I say, they'll do and _they'll_ do well to remember it. And so will you."

It felt unsafe for Tsuru to even think negative thoughts about the crazy woman in front of her. On the other hand, Anko's sadistic nature was severely amused. She loved the thrill of power she had over anyone and everyone. To her it was just a little dose of innocent fun.

"Understood?" Anko questioned pushing the knife so the point just barely touched Tsuru's white neck.

Tsuru gulped and nodded cautiously scared that any sudden movement could potentially kill her.

"Good!" Anko exclaimed as if everything were normal. "We're almost there, but let me know if you need a break. I hear those skinny legs of yours can't go very far."

Infuriated and frightened, Tsuru remained silent the rest of the way home.

Naruto let out a deep sigh of exasperation and disappointment. He had run through all the streets of Konoha with his shadow clones to find a rich child's precious stuffed animal, only to have the job be done by Sasuke. Sakura and Kakashi both praised Sasuke and simply told Naruto "better luck next time!"

"Don't be so down Naruto," Kakashi reassured. "It's good that we all got this done."

"And we get to go home early today!" Sakura cheered.

"Well," Naruto started, "next time I'm going to beat Sasuke! And the Hokage better give us something more difficult that these stupid chores!"

"Watch your tone, Naruto," Sakura warned menacingly with a slight growl.

The trio stood patiently outside the Hokage's office waiting for their turn. Light discussion could be heard through the thick door.

"It's good to be back sir," the strong feminine voice of Tsuru came. "I'll be going now."

Kakashi felt his heart drop into his stomach. He wanted to run so badly, but the door creaked open before he could. His eyes met her blue-gray ones. Her eyes seemed brighter yet still as sad as when the day Hyo passed. There was color in her skin again with a soft tinge of pink in her lips and cheeks. She was still thin but appeared to have gained a healthy amount of weight. That silvery blonde hair seemed shinier and longer. The two looked at each other with mixed feelings.

Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura looked between the two adults who had obvious tension about them. They had never seen their sensei vulnerable.

Without a word, the mysterious woman moved her gaze to the floor and she marched past Kakashi and his students.

"Next!" howled the strong voice of the Hokage.

"Hey guys," Naruto whispered to his peers.

The trio was picking up trash at a local park as Kakashi sat away "supervising" and reading the dirty novel, _Icha Icha Paradise_.

"Who do you think that woman was?" Naruto asked.

"You mean from before?" Sakura asked back. "At the Hokage's office."

"She was pretty," Naruto noted. "Like really pretty."

"Yea," Sakura concurred. "Really pretty."

"Hm," was all Sasuke said.

"Could she be?" Naruto's expression contorted into a devious smile.

Neither Sakura nor Sasuke noticed until Naruto had flashed away that he was headed straight towards Kakashi himself. The two rushed after the hyperactive blonde.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto called.

"Naruto!" Sakura whined.

"What is it?" Kakashi asked the three before him.

"You're still young," Naurto started, "right? At a ripe age for marriage? Maybe even kids?"

"I guess so?" Kakashi said. "You guys really should-"

"We were wondering if you were seeing anyone?" Naruto grinned wide.

"Well," Kakashi started placing his index finger on his temple. "Not really."

Sakura pouted and said, "But that woman from before!"

"What woman?" Kakashi was playing dumb.

"At the Hokage's office!" Sakura compained.

Kakashi sighed before responding to the children, "Guys, I appreciate your concern but I have my own love life in control."

"So she is a lover!" Naruto yelled.

"No Naruto," Kakashi replied. "She is not my lover. I just once worked with her sister."

"Ah! So the sister is your-"

"I don't want to hear anymore of this. Now, go on and finish this mission. We have other things to do today.

Asuma sighed as he placed furniture down in Tsuru's small studio apartment. It was still empty for the most part, but the girl would need a bed at least.

"Sorry for all the trouble," Tsuru said Kindly handing the man a can of soda.

Asuma gladly took the beverage, popped it open, and downed a few gulps before saying, "It's no problem at all! Would have done it even if my father didn't ask."

Tsuru giggled.

"How was the trip here?" Asuma inquired. "I hope Anko didn't cause any trouble."

Cold shivers went down Tsuru's spine as she recalled her brush with death.

"God!" Asuma scoffed. "That woman doesn't know her limits at all! I'll be sure to have a talk with her later."

"No!" Tsuru reassured. "Everything was fine! I crossed her and frankly I don't like even the possibility of seeing her again. Besides, you've done enough already!"

Feeling it was time to change the subject Asuma asked, "Have you seen Kakashi yet?"

Tsuru took a moment before deciding to lie, "Uh, no I haven't."

"Well you should. He's changed a lot over the years you know. Especially after you left. He's…loosened up little."

"Really?" Tsuru acted with disinterest.

"In the end, it's up to you, but I think it might be worth a try."

"Asuma," Tsuru said, "you keep pushing this even though you don't even know what happened. Kakashi hurt me and I'm tired of being hurt. I just want to focus on my health and what I have which isn't much."

Tsuru looked around her new sparse space. She had everything planned. This place was going to become her space and she would spend the next two days decorating and furnishing. Then, she was going to find a decent service job where she was going to make decent friends. Maybe, a dashing man will walk in one day and she will have her five second romance at the cash register with said person. Ninjas were not be registered in her life anymore especially not Kakashi! She would be cordial to people like Asuma but she there was to be no ninjas in her most personal and private life.

"How should I repay you for you help?" Tsuru said.

"No need! Friends help friends. No compensation necessary."

"Alright." _Phew, _Tsuru sighed in relief.

"Actually," Asuma turned on Tsuru, "I was thinking about getting some friends together for barbecue and drinks."

_Boy does meat sound good,_ Tsuru thought with want. "Oh, sorry I went pescatarian for my health My doctor says I shouldn't eat too much meat!"

.

"Well that's fine," Asuma said. "We could just-"he

"Would you look at the time!" Tsuru feigned shock and began pushing Asuma out her door.

"B-but wait!" Asuma attempted only to have Tsuru say another hasty 'Thank you!' And the door slammed shut in his face leaving a flabbergasted Asuma.

Feeling bad for being rude when Asuma was nothing but nice to her, Tsuru did something she would probably regret and cracked the door open.

"I'll go."

The day went by rather quickly. Tsuru finished setting up a small, temporary sleeping area on the ground and hanging on the last article of clothing in the closet. The apartment was filled with boxes and emptiness. Asuma had promised that he would send someone to help her set up the rest of her furniture. Tsuru sighed and remembered all the lovely things she put in the home she shared with Hyo. Green plants lining the white windowsills. Pots and pans hanging effortlessly on wooden hooks in the kitchen.

Tsuru's new place could be a new start, but she had no desire to perform such a laborious task. The blonde looked over at her white alarm clock which read 5:30pm. Asuma asked her to be ready by 6 and he would pick her up with Kurenai.

Tsuru slowly turned her gaze back to the closet stared blankly at a collection of colors. Once before, Tsuru would jump at any chance to get ready. To look pretty and feel like a normal twenty-something year old. Tsuru gazed at herself in the full body mirror. For this night, she picked a dark blue tank top paired with a long white skirt. Tsuru could see that she looked better than she did three years ago. Healthier. Stronger. But it was only ever a matter of time.

_Ding-dong!_

The woman fixed her brightest smile and shouted, "Coming!"

When Tsuru opened the door she saw a happy, handsome, and flushed couple. Clearly they had been up to something prior to meeting Tsuru. Asuma was grinning from ear to ear while there were pieces of hair that seemed unruly on Kurenai's head.

"It's been a while Kurenai-san," Tsuru greeted cordially.

"_San?_" Kurenai thought out loud.

"I hope you've been well," Tsuru smiled.

"I have," Kurenai was a little taken aback at Tsuru's strange and attitude. The woman was always energetic and boisterous. Trying to grasp everyone's attention, but Tsuru had quieted down. Perhaps, it was just age.

The bell above the door rang as the three walked into a small restaurant with just a sushi bar with around eight seats and a few sushi chefs. Already there was Maito Gai, Genma Shiranui, and the feared Anko. It looked as though the jonin had pretty much bought out the place. Tsuru took her seat outside the group next to Kurenai and the two empty chairs. Most importantly, she was on the farthest end away from Anko.

"Finally," Kurenai sighed in relief. "It took me forever to actually book this place! It would be easier if we had been a smaller group, but everyone wanted to come!"

"Luck us," Tsuru said happily.

"Hey!" Anko yelled across the group cheerily. "You! I didn't know you were coming!"

"Asuma invited me after he helped me move my things," Tsuru replied.

"What?" Anko shouted right into Genma's ear. "Can't hear you! Speak up!"

"She said Asuma invited her!" Genma shouted at Anko. "Now sit down and stop yelling into my ear!"

A soft sound rang and a chill went down Tsuru's spine. It was the bell and someone had walked in.

An unfamiliar voice of a woman said, "I booked two seats a while ago because it's so hard to reserve here and I was hoping someone would come here with me. I guess I'm just super lucky today I could come with you, Kakashi-san!"

Tsuru froze and refused to turn while everyone else greeted the man. Suddenly she regretted her choice of seating. In this case, she would much rather have sat next to Anko. At least then, the woman would take the pleasure in killing Tsuru if she asked.

"Oh Kakashi!" Gai yelped. "With a girl? On a date?"

"Hello to you too Gai," Kakashi ignored his friend's questions and took a seat away from Tsuru and let his date sit beside her instead.

Of course.


	12. Chapter 12

The food was stunning and each piece of fish would melt in your mouth, but Tsuru was having trouble enjoying her meal. The woman beside her, Kakashi's _date_, would giggle too sharply and just a touch too loud it pierced Tsuru's eardrum. Though they had never met and it would be illogical to think anything ill, Tsuru couldn't help but think this was all a set up to mock her.

Tsuru occasionally looked over at the handsome, silver-haired man. His expression was still and unfazed as if he had never even met Tsuru before. He wore the standard Konoha uniform instead of the ANBU gear she had been used to seeing. In reality, Tsuru knew little about Kakashi. When did he stop being an ANBU? She only knew so much back when her little sister Hyo was around. Hyo, infatuated with the Copy Ninja, would tell her older sister about how there was no better shinobi in this world than Kakashi himself. But what exactly does it mean to be the best shinobi?

Delicate fingers raised chopsticks again to reach for a piece of thinly sliced yellowtail. Suddenly a sharp pain pierced through the palm of her hand in a pins and needle cramp.

"Ah!" Tsuru yelped and dropped her chopsticks to floor. She held her hand with her other and massaged it, but the pain wouldn't mitigate.

"Are you okay?" Kurenai asked concerned remembering that time Tsuru's legs had failed. "What is it?

"It's just my hand," Tsuru reassured. The pain didn't grow but it wouldn't subside.

"Is everything alright?" Gai also inquired in a his loud voice. "Is it your hand? Shall I come over and feed you?"

"No, no, no!" Tsuru tried to object as politely as possible. She reached into her pocket with her spare hand and pulled out some cash to place on the table. "I'll just leave some money here. I think I should go home."

"But you've barely eaten!" Kurenai protested. The red-eyed woman then saw Tsuru holding her hand trying desperately trying to placate the pain. "Let me at least help you home. Sir, could we take some of this food togo!"

Kurenai and Tsuru walked awkwardly. The two weren't too close and never had been. Tsuru had also changed quite a bit from what Kurenai remembered. She was more distant and colder. So unlike the Tsuru from just three years ago, but Kurenai could only assume it was her brush with death.

"Have you spoken to Kakashi yet?" Kurenai questioned innocently.

"Why does everyone keep asking me about that guy?" Tsuru exclaimed throwing her hands in the air. "Ow…" Tsuru immediately went back to massaging her hurt hand. "Look, I've had a long day and I would really like to not talk about…"

In front of their path was Kakashi Hatake. There he was. All tall, relaxed, and good looking. None of it was fair and it brought Tsuru's annoyance to heights she thought it couldn't reach. She turned to tell Kurenai that they should leave, but of course the kunoichi disappeared like magic. Tsuru groaned. She looked straight at the man who just looked back at her. The blonde stuck her chin up and proceeded to walk past him. Before she could get too far he caught her wrist.

"Please let go," Tsuru requested in a bitter tone.

"I'm sorry," he said much too cool.

A breath of vexed air audibly left Tsuru. She looked up at the man who towered over her and ripped her wrist back only to realize that that was the hurt hand. Tsuru winced and said through her teeth, "For what?"

"Everything."

"You can't just-" she huffed. "It's not okay that-" Again. "I can't do this right now. Ow!" The striking pain intensified.

"Let me see that," without permission Kakashi simply took Tsuru's hand. The woman couldn't protest when Kakashi began rubbing the swollen area. She could feel his chakra washing over her hand in a wave of warmth just like she remembered.

"Kakashi-sensei!" it was the loud and obnoxious blonde boy. He ran towards his sensei and he was alone.

"Naruto?" Kakashi said confused.

"I need you to train me!" Naruto demanded. The boy then saw Tsuru's hand in Kakashi's, then Tsuru herself. "Ah! It's the pretty woman from earlier! S-sorry! I didn't realize you guys were on a date!"

Tsuru sighed and pulled her hand away from Kakashi's once more, "No, we're not on a date. I was just going home when this_ stranger _who happened to be on a date with_ another girl_ just grabbed me out of nowhere."

With that the woman stormed off into the street leaving a confused boy and a disappointed Kakashi.

"So you weren't with that lady?" Naruto scratched his head.

"I guess not," was Kakashi's reply. The man parted with his student and towards his home. He had left his date rather unannounced and left her in the care of Genma and Gai—which might not have been the best idea. The woman he had clearly heartbroken out of his own fears didn't even want to acknowledge his existence. There he stood pathetically next to Naruto. However, Kakashi was different from just three years ago. Frankly, he wasn't ready to give up. Even if he and Tsuru couldn't pursue a relationship, Kakashi wanted to make amends.

Tsuru fell into a troubled sleep full of tosses and turns. At one point she felt so heated—the summer heat, of course—Tsuru angrily opened the window to let in a cool breeze. She wasn't sure when she finally gave in, but she couldn't have been asleep for long as something tapped on her window. She groggily rose out of her sheets and her sight was momentarily blinded by the sunlight. Once her vision fixed, she made out the figure of a man.

"Morning," Kakashi greeted with a smile. She hadn't seen him smile so easily before. The Kakashi she knew was cold, stoic. Hardened by his years as a high class, elite ninja.

"What the fuck?" Tsuru swore harshly. "Hey, it's like so early what are you doing? Also, how do you know where I live?"

"What do you mean it's early? It's noon."

"What?!" Tsuru whipped around to look at the alarm clock beside her bed to see that it was in fact 12PM. The woman groaned and fell back into her sheets. "Please go away. I don't want to talk to you."

"I just really wanted to-"

"Arrrgghhh!" Tsuru got up in her tousled hair to face Kakashi at the window. She shut the glass pane shut and locked it. Then she pulled the curtains to block him out. Relieved, she plopped herself back into bed.

Kakashi sighed. How could he blame her for rejecting him? After all he had-

"Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura shouted from below. "What are you doing up there? You're not peeping are you?"

"What?" Kakashi rolled his eyes and jumped down to see all three of his students had tracked him down. "What are you all doing here?"

"You were late," Sasuke's tone was cool but clearly distraught at his sensei's behavior.

"So we came looking for you," Naruto added. "Believe it!"

"And you've been caught redhanded!" Sakura wagged her finger at the man. "You're clearly up to no good, Kakashi-sensei! Do you do this kind of thing every time?"

Kakashi's three students continued the argue and bicker making assumptions on what their sensei could possibly have been up to all those times he had been disgustingly late. Right as Kakashi was about to say something to his subordinates, the front door of Tsuru's apartment building opened.

Out stepped Tsuru, her hair now tamed and her face a little livelier. She wore that same pale yellow dress and white cardigan that he remembered. As always she was charming, delicate, and lovely.

"Tsuru-" without even his own permission Kakashi tried to speak.

Tsuru stopped him by raising his hand and spoke, "Please. I'm busy today and I'm already running behind schedule, so I'm going to go."

Kakashi could only stutter as the pale woman walked away. His three students exchangedconspicuous looks. They had to get to the bottom of whatever was going on between the pretty lady named Tsuru and their sensei.

Eventually, Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, and Kakashi—Team Seven—finally got to their odd job, D-ranked missions. Today was trash picking. Though not exciting, it was the perfect time for the three to get together now and then to plan their scheme.

"It's pretty clear that Kakashi-sensei and that Tsuru-neechan have something going on," Naruto whispered.

"She seemed pretty hostile though," Sasuke remarked. "Those two must have been through something."

"You're so right, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura's eyes filled with stars.

"That's literally what I said!" Naruto cried. "Ugh, whatever! So what's the plan guys?"

"I don't know, Naruto," Sakura started, "I'm not sure if we should be meddling in Kakashi-sensei's love life this time. What if he actually really likes and she actually really hates him? Wouldn't blame her though. Kakashi-sensei's always using his charm and looks to take advantage of people."

"What's that about me?" Kakashi suddenly appeared behind the three out of nowhere causing the preteens to tense up.

"N-nothing!" Sakura lied in fear.

"Y-y-yea!" Naruto argreed with a nervous laugh. "Just that you're charming and handsome, Kakashi-sensei! Aha..aha..ahaha! It's a mystery to us why you don't have a girlfriend!"

The three calmed down and Sakura took the opportunity to ask, "But sensei, who is that Tsuru girl? You two obviously know each other."

"Oh," Kakashi was slighlt taken aback by Sakura's forwardness. "She's…the sister of a good friend. And I might have messed that friendship up a long time ago, but before I could say sorry, Tsuru had to leave the village."

"Why?" Naruto asked excitedly to hear about his sensei's drama. "Was she a super secret spy who had to go undercover for a super important mission?"

"No," Kakashi chuckled at the ridiculous statement. "She just had to leave. The rest isn't any of your business and you guys better not meddle! Now hurry up with this mission, we have a lot more to do today!"

"Yessir!" Kakashi could see that the three were lying through their teeth, but something held him back from pushing them out of his love life farther. Perhaps, somewhere deep down, he wanted something to work.

Plan A was simple. Plan A involved the one person transforming into a criminal while the other two keep Kakashi in the right place. Whoever plays criminal would steal Tsuru's personal belongings and be caught by Kakashi who would then save the helpless woman.

Plan B involved the three genin to push the man towards the woman with flowers in his hands somehow.

So Plan A was to be executed.

The following day, Tsuru signed delivery papers for her new furniture to come the next day. She held bags of flowers and small knick-knacks to place around her home. Tsuru held her purse loosely on the other shoulder. Her hands were pretty full. Next to buy, was kitchen utensils. But only after she stopped by at home for some rest. Her hands were beginning to shake from exhaustion and her knees felt a little weak.

The woman carried her things in the direction of her new home. It felt weird at times since this new apartment was on the other side of town from her old one that she shared with Hyo. Yet the familiarity of the streets was still comforting. Tsuru loved Konoha, she truly did from the bottom of her heart. Wooden buildings and fences. Colorful rooftops. There was something that made her feel so at home here. So safe.

The smile that slowly formed on Tsuru's face suddenly vanished as a wind rushed past her knocking her to the ground. Before she could register it, her purse had been swept away with the wind. Too shocked, Tsuru found herself shakily trying to stand up. But the panic had overcome all her muscles. Fear that she would never able to stand started to settle in like it had so many times before.

A strong hand pulled her to her two feet. In the man's other arm was a trapped boy dressed in dirty rags with her purse in his hand. Kakashi had saved her again.

"You okay?" he asked releasing her once he knew she was stable.

"I think so," she replied.

Kakashi forcibly ripped the purse out of the boy's hands and handed it back to Tsuru. She felt bad for the poor boy so she reached into her purse and took out a piece of candy and a few coins she kept in case her blood sugar got low.

Tsuru handed it to the child and smiled. "Hey kid, sometimes if you need some help it's better to just ask. Let the boy go. I think he's been through enough."

Kakashi glared down at the child momentarily who looked visibly scared and then turned his attention to the spot Tsuru was once standing in. Kakashi looked back at the boy.

"I'll talk to _you_ later," Kakashi nearly growled.

He knew it was Naruto. It was his team's shenanigans and this stunt just might have crossed the line. Kakashi let the Naruto disguised as a poor boy go and the boy ran away. Quickly Kakashi caught up to Tsuru who's pace was slow.

"Leave me alone Kakashi," she said. "Thanks for your help back there, but I can handle things myself now."

"Let me at least carry your things for you," Kakashi without permission took her belongings and walked be frank, Tsuru's arms felt relieved as the excess weight had disappeared. However, it bothered her that she still depended on people like Kakashi, Asuma, and Hyo so much. Then again, was she even in the position to complain?

Neither struck up much of a conversation for the duration of their walk. It should have felt awkward, but there was always something so comforting about Kakashi. His chakra always felt calm and soothing. Now more so than ever. Tsuru recalled that Asuma had claimed that Kakashi had changed. In Tsuru's eyes, Kakashi did seem more confident in himself yet relaxed. The way he stood was more laid back than the straight-backed, uptight ANBU he was before. Broad shoulders slouched ever so slightly as he carried plastic bags in one arm and an orange book in the other. What was that book he was so invested in anyways?

Suddenly curious, Tsuru attempted to sneak behind him and stand on the tips of her toes to catch a glimpse at the words. She struggled as her eyes could barely reach his neck. Briefly the blonde woman saw a few words. _Their bodies…his tongue…her big breasts and Junko's dripping-_

Kakashi quickly turned around and leaned to be at eye level with Tsuru who blushed and looked away. Certainly, Kakashi had let go of his morals!

Tsuru stuttered, "W-what?"

"We're here," Kakashi responded. He was right, somewhere in that time the two had come upon Tsuru's home.

"Oh," Tsuru said surprised. The woman took the bags from Kakashi's hand. "Thank's Kakashi-san, I'll take things from here."

"Tsuru," Kakashi stopped the woman and looked her in the eyes very seriously. Tsuru was tired of this nonsense, but Kakashi spoke first. "Listen, I'm not expecting anything from you. I just need to be honest. Hear me out and I'll leave you alone, okay?"

Tsuru sighed defeatedly and finally nodded. "Go on."

"I'm a terrible man," Kakashi started, "and frankly I don't deserve you and you deserve to be treated better than the likes of me. What I did to you was unforgivable specially what I did after that night in the hospital."

This caught Tsuru's attention and she felt her heart breaking again. Why was she still here? Why was she still letting him speak? It's over. She thought she had let go of any and all feelings she had for this man. Why does it hurt all over again?

"Back then I had already lost so much. The trauma of the war was still fresh in my mind and I was young. I always pretended to be mature. Pretended to know everything when I didn't know anything at all. I knew sleeping with another woman would hurt you, yet I still did it. And I did it because in my fucked up mind, I thought I would be protecting you by cutting all ties with you. Even if that meant hurting you. No number of apologies can erase what I did, but…_Fuck. _Sorry, this sounded a lot more fluent in my head." Kakashi sighed and looked at Tsuru who was on the brink of tears. "I did like you and I know I made a mistake. I think I still like you even to this day, but I've already come to terms with it. I don't deserve someone like you, Tsuru. Sure a lot of people have acknowledged me, but actually, I'm the greatest piece of trash this world has ever seen."

Kakashi watched Tsuru look away and purse her lips.

"I guess that's all I wanted to say," Kakashi looked down at his feet for a brief second. Then, he decided to turn to leave when he finally heard Tsuru.

"You can't do this to me," Tsuru's voice was quivering. Too weak to scream even though he could hear her desperate need to. "And right after Hyo died? How could you?"

He didn't want to look back at her. Kakashi hated thinking about her crying especially when it was him making her cry. God, civilians were so fucking fragile. God, how terrible is he to be blaming someone for tearing up because of what _he_ did? The mistakes _he_ made?

"You never even told me anything about yourself," Tsuru whined. "How could I have been such an idiot to have fallen for someone who never even cared to tell me his birthday? His favorite color? Who is even _Rin _anyways?"

This struck a chord in Kakashi. Tsuru felt his mood go dark even before he said in a scolding tone, "Rin. Rin is the biggest reason I'm the greatest piece of trash in this world. Even more than what I did to you, Rin is something I regret even more. If you want to know anything about me, it's that you don't want to mention her name in front of me."

Tsuru met his eyes with the same intensity clearly not amused or satisfied with his answer. She held strong for a few moments until the man quickly jumped away. The woman groaned and stormed into her aparment only to fall to her knees with her head buried in her hands. Why did he always do this to her? Why did he make her feel so many things she had never felt before? Why was it, he was the only reason she felt truly alive?


	13. Chapter 13

Time passed. Things were…fine. As fine as it could be in its most generic sense. Kakashi reprimanded his team for what they did, but didn't ask for them to apologize to her. In fact, when Sakura suggested the idea, Kakashi just said "It's fine." He didn't want to think about her or their _discussion._

After Kakashi's discussion with Tsuru, he found himself before Rin's grave. He always found himself back at her grave. Back at Obito's—the boy who gave Kakashi his famed sharing—grave. Back his father's grave. Back at the graves of everyone he's ever let down in his life. One day, Tsuru would become one of those names in stone he would have to look down at. If it were to be the other way around, Kakashi wondered if Tsuru would look down at his name.

Time always felt like an illusion to Tsuru. These days, it was often blurry between all the acupuncture appointments, physicals, _and finding a job! _Looks as though no one wants to hire a terminally ill, unmarried twenty-something woman who's needs are a whole lot greater than what these jobs are asking for. While she was getting allowances from the government and Hyo and her parents had left quite a bit of what was left. In short, it was enough to survive for now but not enough to last.

Tsuru sipped on a small carton of soy milk almost like a child in the hospital bed. One thing that was good was that her whole family was full of ninjas so anything medical related was free for Tsuru.

A nurse gently knocked on the door then slid the door open. She held a clipboard in one arm and a tray in the other with an injection. A very large injection with a very long needle. The longest she had ever seen in fact and Tsuru had seen a lot of different needles in her time.

"Are you ready for your injection?" the nurse asked with an all too amicable smile.

"W-w-what kind of injection is that?" Tsuru asked. "I thought I was just going to get a vitamin injection."

"This is a new injection!" the nurse replied cheerily. "Fits an incredible number of different vitamins and necessary protein to promote muscle growth and bone density! Modern medicine is truly phenomenal!"

"Right…I'm going to go to the bathroom first, if that's okay."

"Of course! I'll be waiting!"

Tsuru smiled as she walked out of the room, but the second the sliding door shut closed and the blonde woman broke into a sprint for her life. The woman dashed down the hall way and jumped into a random room.

"Are you okay, Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura asked politely handing her sensei a basket of apples provided by her mother.

"Yea," Kakashi answered sitting up in his own hospital bed. "Just a little tired, thanks."

"You push yourself too hard, sensei!" Sakura scolded. "What would have happened if you had fainted in the middle of a battle?"

"Aw c'mon, Sakura-chan!" Naruto exclaimed. "You gotta give it to him, that fight was amazing!"

Sasuke merely "hmph-ed" in what everyone could only guess as an acknowledgement.

Kakashi laughed sheepishly.

Suddenly, the door to Kakashi's room slid open and slammed shut. The team of shinobi turned to see a small child. A little girl dressed in a hospital gown with yellow hair and bright blue eyes opened wide with fear. Kakashi couldn't help but think of Tsuru and felt as though he was seeing Tsuru when she was a child.

"S-s-sorry," the child squeaked. "I-I-I just-"

"OUTTA THE WAY!" Another voice yelled as an older woman also jumped into the room. The child jumped out of the way just in time for none other than Tsuru to stumbled and fall to the floor, slamming the door shut once more. Immediately Tsuru's eye matched Kakashi's.

It was always like this. Tsuru always just fell right back into his life…Literally. Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura all felt the strained tension between the pale woman and their sensei as the two stared at each other wide eyed.

A chill went down Tsuru's spine as she felt two menacing presences approach the door. She held her breath as the already abused door slammed open once more.

"Tsuru-san," the voice was a ghostly growl.

"Koyubi-chan," another voice called in a similar tone.

Tsuru and the little girl named Aka turned slowly to face their dooms.

Noise, she always brought noise with her. Everywhere she went, Tsuru made noise. It took everything in Kakashi not to laugh. Thankfully he had a mask on to hide a small smile.

The two sat beside each other on a bed with their heads down and hands in their lap. The two looked as though they could be sisters or just different versions of each other from different points in each other's lives.

"You two can't just run away and avoid procedures that are meant to help you!" one nurse yelled. "Tsuru-san, it's imperative that you take this shot! It could mean another year of living for you!"

"And Koyubi-chan," the other nurse began to lecture, "you cannot keep running away from your blood test! We have to monitor your condition!"

Neither responded to the nurses, instead Koyubi tugged on Tsuru's sleeve.

"Nee-san," the girl whined, "Are you scared of needles too?"

The rest of the room grew silent and watched with sad eyes.

"What's happening?" Naruto whispered the question to his peers.

Sakura shot him an intense and very serious look immediately shutting the boy down. While he didn't fully comprehend the situation, he knew that Tsuru was not well.

Tsuru grabbed the Koyubi's small hand and held it in hers. The chakra signal from Koyubi was weak, but it was still there. Subtle, but still trembling with life.

"I am scared of needles," Tsuru answered, "but I've had so many, I've kind of gotten used to them over the years. Yet, somehow, they always get bigger and the fear always catches back up."

Koyubi held her down lower in shame and said barely audibly, "I really don't want to get my blood drawn. Besides, what the point? I'm probably going to die anyways and it's better that I do."

While everyone else's expressions were downcast, Tsuru merely frowned. She held up her right hand and flicked Koyubi's pale forehead.

"Ow!" Koyubi yelped in pain. "Why'd you-"

Tsuru wasn't going to have it. "Listen here, Koyubi-chan! You're right, knowing that you're to die earlier than everyone else is scary. But what's the point in waiting for it to come when you actually don't know. When I was eight I was told I wouldn't live passed the age of fifteen. Then at fifteen I was told I wouldn't live past twenty and look at me now! Twenty-six! I've outlived the doctor's prediction by eleven years now. I've spent my entire life counting days until I died and when it never came, I realized how much time I've wasted. Koyubi-chan, you dont' have to be or live like me. There are things you can still do. These deadlines are as fixed as predictions told by a silly fortune teller. There's nothing we can do about our demise, but we have to find ways to make our lives worth living."

He watched Koyubi's face brightened at Tsuru's words. Kakashi thought he briefly saw Tsuru look at him and he remembered why he had fallen for the fragile woman in the first place. She was a fool, but a fool with a reason. He envied her ability to brush away the imminent pain and see the light in the darkest times. She even saw something in his own pathetic self.

Tsuru tightened her grip on Koyubi's hand. "But first, we have to stop running from nurses and do what they want us to do so we can stay as strong as possible." Koyubi's gulped and her tiny fall fell once more. Tsuru noticed this and offered, "Then how about this? We'll get both our procedures done together. We'll hold each other's hands really tight and give each other some courage."

Right then a third nurse walked in and said brightly, "Kakashi-san, we'll need a blood sample from you before we discharge you in a few says. Oh!" The nurse exclaimed surprised at the number of people and nurses in one room. "So many people getting things done today!"

Tsuru made eye contact with Kakashi who kept his one red eye closed. It was a vexed but pleading look asking him to come sit beside Koyubi. She was willing to put aside their feud for this child.

"Well then," Kakashi let out breathily as he got up from his bed. The man half limped towards Tsuru and Koyubi and took a seat on the other side of the little girl. "I'll give you some of my courage too, if that's alright with you." Kakashi leaned just slightly closer to the girl and whispered.

Tsuru visibly pouted at the silver-haired fox. Koyubi blushed at the sight and proximity of such a handsome man.

"A-are you scared of needles too, mister?" Koyubi asked shyly.

Tsuru waited for Kakashi's answer with sharp ears as the man leaned down to whisper into Koyubi's ear. "Shhh, it's a secret. Or else I'll never hear the end of it from my students back there!"

Koyubi giggled and whispered back, "I promise!"

"I think we're _all_ ready," Kakashi told the nurses who all eagerly took the three patients' arms and proceeded with their work at last.

Koyubi's hand tightened around Tsuru's as the two girls hid their faces into each other in an uncomfortable embrace. With Kakashi at the other end, Tsuru felt that this was what having a her own family would feel like. What it would feel like to be a mother with a loving spouse and a child. This was what it felt like to be normal.

Tsuru raised her face slightly out of Koyubi's golden hair to look over at Kakashi who was calmly watching the blood leave his vein. Of course the shinobi noticed this and looked right back at her. At first, Tsuru forgot why she fell in love with Kakashi. After all, he was pigheaded, selfish, and cold-hearted. However, all those negative qualities made her forget about his dependability, sturdiness, loyalty—not counting _that one time—_and true care for those he found precious.

"All done!" the nurses said proudly and the three smiled widely at each other. Tsuru's and Kakashi's nurses left the room on their own accord, trusting that the adults could handle themselves. Koyubi hugged Tsuru and bowed to Kakashi respectfully before walking out with her own nurse.

Tsuru had completely forgotten she was in a room she wasn't supposed to be in. Not to mention the three preteens standing behind her. She recognized them as Kakashi's students, but never introduced herself. However, and more importantly, how did she just happen to land in Kakashi's room?

"Um," Tsuru stammered. "Sorry. I'll leave."

Just like that, Tsuru exited Kakashi's room.

"So," Sakura hesitated. "have you two figured things out?" Sakura was unsure of what the status quo of Karachi and Tsuru. Previously, Sakura's intuition told her that it wasn't okay. However, that whole scene with the Koyubi child said different.

"Sorry guys," Kakashi blatantly ignored Sakura's question. "I think I'm going to catch up on some rest. Thanks for visiting."

His students did as they were told leaving Kakashi alone with that little orange book that he found no pleasure in at that moment. Actually, he had tried reading it over and over again but none of what was written felt real anymore. Granted, it's a work of fiction written by an outrageous man. However, Kakashi often relied on it to fill in the gaps of his youth. Things he'd missed. Thing's that he could have thought of to make things better with Tsuru. Yet, none of it could help because this was real life.

They pretended with Koyubi that nothing was wrong. He felt like they were so good at faking it in that moment. It seemed so natural even to him despite the fact it was all a lie.

Tsuru stood on the roof of the hospital looking out at the village. She and Hyo used to sneak up here when they were young and have picnics together. They often wondered what the future would look like. Places like Amegakure had steel buildings that rose into the clouds and Tsuru would wonder if Konoha would ever become a city of such modernity. If she would live to see the day of movie theaters in comfort of her own home. New modes of communication that would make messenger birds obsolete. An entire library in the palms of her hands. A world of science fiction and pure imagination raced through Tsuru's mind. A world where people like her Koyubi could be saved in a matter of a single surgical procedure or an injection along with a quick and painless recovery.

Kakashi hid behind white sheets that flowed in the wind. The hospital rooftop was often used to dry fresh laundry. Like the sheets, he saw Tsuru's silvery blonde hair flow with the wind. She was looking out at the village in silence. Maybe, this was a bad time.

"I know you're there," Tsuru called the man out. "I can feel your chakra."

"You caught me," Kakashi said while walking up the woman to stand next to her. Instead of looking out at the village, Kakashi looked up at the clouds drawing out shapes in his mind.

"Thanks," Tsuru said after a moment of silence. "I'm sure Koyubi-chan was grateful."

"Don't thank me. You're the one that really helped her."

Tsuru looked over at the man who looked peacefully up at the sky. He wore a a blue sleeveless top showing off his red tattoo that marked his involvement with the ANBU Black Ops. It reminded Tsuru of Kakashi's strength, power, and skill. He had once lived to assassinate on command. _Cold-blooded Kakashi. _

"I stopped being an ANBU soon after you left," Kakashi answered her question as if he read her mind. "It hasn't been too long actually. Just three years."

His answer made Tsuru's heart swell a little with happiness. "I'm glad you're out of there," Tsuru said.

"Well, if the Hokage ordered it, I'd go back without question. But things have been good lately. Not perfect, but good. Konoha deserves to see some peace."

"So do you."

"And you too."

"Kakashi, I-"

"Rin," Tsuru shut her mouth and her heart dropped at the sound of the name. "Rin was my teammate when I boy. Her and Obito Uchiha. My sensei was Minato Namikaze, the Yondaime." Kakashi took his eyes away from the sky to face Tsuru with both eyes open. Tsuru shivered at the sight of his uneven eyes. A scar ran through the blood red eye that visibly looked out of place. It was a beautiful yet fearsome thing to look at as she felt its dark presence. She reached out her slim fingers to try and touch him, but she put her hand back down at her side.

"You don't have to tell me this," Tsuru reassured.

Kakashi disregaded her requestion. "We were sent on a mission during the war. I had just become a jonin and I was going to lead my first mission to blow up Kannabi Bridge—a vital bridge in Kusagakure that provided Iwagakure's line of supply.

Minato-sensei left me in charge of this task with Obito and Rin while he went to save a group of trapped Konoha shinobi. At one point, Rin was captured. Back then I didn't believe in teamwork or comrades. When my father passed, I had abandoned all of his principals because those were the very things that put the great Sakumo Hatake to shame. I refused to be anything like my father who pathetically took his own life."

Tsuru had heard the tragic tale of Sakumo Hatake, the White Fang, whose talent and skill matched that of the Legendary Sannin. The man who saved his friends when he could have single handedly turned the tide of the war and come out a hero. The man who was shamed for breaking the ruled and was ultimately bullied into suicide.

"So, I abandoned Rin," Kakashi said this with so much spite in his voice. So much spite for himself. "Obito, who loved Rin, told me that 'those who break the rules are considered scum, but those who abandon their friends are worse than scum.' We went separate ways. He went to save Rin and I went to finish the mission.

As idiotic and foolish I thought Obito was, his words changed me. So I went back to save Rin. I lost my eye in battle _and_ I lost Obito. We were fighting an Iwagakure shinobi who brought the cave down. I pushed Rin out of the way of getting crushed by a boulder and the last thing I remembered was a rock coming down on me. Weird thing was, I never felt it hit. When I woke up, there was Obito crushed under the very rock that was meant to kill me.

He awakened his Sharingan for the very first time. He used to threaten me that once his Sharingan awoke, he would be able to surpass me. But when he finally did, that was the end for him. Obito asked me to take his remaining eye and use it to protect the one he loved, Rin.

The mission was a success, but I couldn't keep the last promise I made to my best friend. About a year after Obito's death, Rio was kidnapped again. This time, they sealed something in here, the Sanbi. They were going to send her back into Konoha and unleash the beast to wreck havoc on the village. At the time, Konoha couldn't afford anymore damages after the Kyuubi attack. Frankly we were at our weakest and Rin kept begging me to leave her. Kill her even.

Even though I kept telling her that I wouldn't let anything happen to her, I didn't really have a plan on what to do. On top of that, we were surrounded by enemy ninja. Completely outnumbered. In the midst of battle, Rin ran herself into my hand. I put a whole in her heart and her face was the last thing I saw before waking up in the hospital."

Kakashi saw Tsuru raise her hand again. He thought that she reached out to touch his eye so he closed it, but she instead wrapped her arm around his neck and pulled him into an embrace. He was too shocked to return the gesture, but she just held him there.

"I'm sorry, _Kakashi-kun_," she said his name like she used to and Kakashi's heart skipped a beat. "I haven't been very fair to you."

The man finally put a hand on the small of Tsuru's back holding her closer and said, "No. Nothing excuses everything I've done to you."

Tsuru pulled away to face Kakashi once more. "Some people say that true love is fate." Kakashi just listened. "I want to thank you for everything. For telling me this. But if this is true love, Kakashi, then it isn't something as kind as fate. _It's a curse._

If some god out there put us together, it was a cruel god who wanted to watch us both suffer. We're playing this cat and mouse game where we don't know who's the cat and who's the mouse. We're running circles like two idiots waiting to see who dies first."

"This isn't a game, Tsuru," Kakashi eyes narrowed and his tone was critical. "This is real life and we're not kids. We can't keep pushing away our feelings for our own selfish reasons. "

"But I can't do any of this!" Tsuru yelled. "I can't give you anything, but more pain! Even if we're happy together, it's all temporary because we'll hurt each other in the end. It's better just to end it before-"

"Before what? Before you die? Before I die? Didn't you just tell a little girl to find something worth living for? To stop questioning and thinking about when she's going to die?"

"Call me a hypocrite! I don't fucking care! You're not the one who only has a year left to live!"

Kakashi's world blurred for a second from shock. There was an overload of emotions running through his entire body and all he could muster to say was, "A year?"

"I'm not back in the village because I'm better," Tsuru explained. "I'm back because they asked if there was anything I wanted in potentially some of my last days and I said I wanted to come home. I wanted to try and live like a normal person. That's my last wish."

In that moment, Kakashi realized that everything Tsuru was saying to Koyubi were all things she was actually saying to herself. Maybe, they were cursed forever and someone sadistic force was enjoying the little show they were putting on for the whole universe to see. However, Kakashi wasn't a superstitious person. He believed in coincidences but he didn't believe in such a thing as fate.

Just a few years ago, Kakashi would have never done what he was about to do. He would've heeded Tsuru's warning before even hearing her say it, but Kakashi was done being stuck in his past mistakes. He was tired of thinking about what he couldn't have and pitying himself for it. He was tired of protecting other people by hurting them and himself in the process. He wanted her and that was final.

Kakashi grasped Tsuru by her shoulders. He took one hand off to pulled down his mask. Tsuru often tried recalling his face from the time he had first kissed her. Now, she remembered it clearly.

"Don't try to everything on your own," Kakashi's voice sounded pleading and firm at the same time, "and let me help you."He leaned down closer so that their noses touched.

Tsuru was a woman who was stuck in her own future. Unable to do anything about her predetermined fate. She kept saying she wanted a normal life, but her perspective was skewed. Tsuru thought that a normal life meant living in a house with a job, but she completely forgot about connections. People. Friends. Family. She had been alone this whole time in Konoha because she shut everyone out. Then here he was. Chasing her, giving her a chance at what she wanted, and welcoming her despite knowing that they were fighting time.

Neither Kakashi nor Tsuru moved. Kakashi waited for her permission and Tsuru took her time to make her decision.

"Are you sure?" Tsuru asked.

"You're the one that sounds unsure," Kakashi joked making Tsuru pout.

Tsuru grabbed him by the collar of his top and crashed his lips into hers.


	14. Chapter 14

Even after Kakashi left the ANBU and began pursuing something as seemingly innocent as teaching genin, that didn't change the fact that he was still considered an elite-class shinobi. Nothing would change the missions and nothing would change his lighting hand piercing through his enemies. At this point, Kakashi was so good at it. So good that if someone were to defeat him, they'd get paid a pretty price for his head. Killing was a desensitized act now. Yet the only thing that kept him up was Rin.

The memories of his past still came creeping back as nightmares, but they were less frequent. Actually, they were at an all time low. His nights, every since Tsuru invited him to occasionally sleep in her bed, had been quiet. She brought him peace and more restful nights.

Sunlight washed over his face that morning and his eyes cracked open slowly. The weight under his arm was comfortable and he turned his head to look at the source. Kakashi smiled softly at the sleeping form of Tsuru. Subsequently, Tsuru too began to wake up groggily.

"Hmm?" she moaned an incoherent question.

"There's still some time left," Kakashi answered as he pulled the woman closer. "Get some more sleep."

"Hmm," she moaned again and her breathing fell back into a soothing pattern of slumber.

Whenever Kakashi came over, Tsuru often woke up alone in her bed. It didn't upset her in the least. In fact, it gave her an opportunity to squeal happily in the comfort of her own home. While the two had not taken _that_ step in their relationship, Tsuru was more than satisfied with having Kakashi in her bed with his limbs lazily wrapped around her.

While Kakashi often couldn't be present for her mornings, he made sure that he could still be there somehow. Usually he'd leave a piece of buttered toast with juice or milk on the side and placed her morning medication on a napkin. Tsuru happily gulped down her medication with a swig of milk and looked out the window in pure serenity.

Konoha always seemed cheery. White light flushed through the windows along with a soft breeze. While Tsuru of course hated this place, she had come to accept it.

Tsuru walked through the hospital halls in a simple white t-shirt and flowing green pants. As she blissfully moved along she came across an slightly open door to a room. She heard sounds of small sobs emitting from inside. Tsuru pushed the door to the side and saw Koyubi crying with her head buried in her hands alone in her bed.

"Koyubi-chan?" Tsuru called out gently.

The young child hiccuped and suddenly screamed, "GET OUT!"

Tsuru was taken aback for a moment then frowned. The woman marched towards the girl and kneeled to meet her at her level. Koyubi's cries only grew louder. "Hey you!" Tsuru tried getting Koyubi's attention sternly.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Koyubi struggled as Tsuru tried tugging the little girl's arms away from her face. "STOP IT!" Koyubi began to kick and Tsuru let her little feet roughly press repeatedly into her collarbone and chest.

"That's enough!" Tsuru yelled scoldingly. Koyubi ceased her physical resistance but was crying louder than ever.

"I don't want to live anymore!" Koyubi cried. "I don't want to do this anymore! There's nothing for me if I live but more pain!"

Tsuru released her grip on Koyubi's wrists. She watched girl wail for a moment in sorrow. Tsuru had never seen Koyubi with family or visitors so it seemed as though the little girl truly had no one in her life. For Tsuru, she fortunately had gotten the chance to see her parents and had Hyo take care of her her entire life. Now, Tsuru had Kakashi to lean on. Koyubi, however, from the very beginning had no one to guide her through this fearful time.

Gently, Tsuru put her hand on the back of Koyubi's head and brought her into a tight embrace. Tsuru held the little girl there and let her cry into her. If no one could be there for her, then she would. Koyubi's cries began to die down after a few minutes and Tsuru decided to pull away.

"Can you tell me what happened to make you so upset?" Tsuru asked.

Koyubi sniffled but was too tired to cry much more. Her voice was raspy and her throat seemed dry. Tsuru had already called in a nurse who was passing by concerned for a class of water and something sweet.

"Can you tell me now?" Tsuru sat beside Koyubi and fed her the glass of water.

"I-I I don't w-want to d-d-d-do the sur-surgery," Koyubi's replied through hiccups.

"I know honey," Tsuru put the cup down and wrapped an arm around the poor girl. "How bad is it?"

Koyubi sniffled and tried to get herself together with a deep breath. In this second of quiet, Tsuru noticed that Koyubi's hair was gone and her head was instead covered by a white beanie. Different tubes and wires stuck out of Koyubi's white attire.

"T-they say," Koyubi gulped and took another breath, "it's starting to spread a-and I need to get surgery. T-they all tell me that I'll get better and that I'll be fine, but I hear them talking. T-they say that I-I could d-die during the surgery."

Koyubi's expression twisted into a pained look as if something had jabbed her through her heart. Tsuru felt that pain all too well.

"Didn't you just say you wanted to die?" Tsuru joked solemnly causing Koyubi to glare. "What? You did just say that."

"Of course I don't want to die!" Koyubi admitted angrily. "I'm just scared and no one's going to be there! I have no one."

Tsuru fell silent for a moment. Even just a year ago, Tsuru wouldn't really have understood the way Koyubi felt. Hyo had always been there. Even when she wasn't physically present, Tsuru would always wake up knowing that Hyo would come back. When Hyo stopped coming back and Tsuru spent those years alone in a foreign place, it was true emptiness that had overcome her. And this child was who had spent her entire life in that empty place.

In that moment, Tsuru wondered if Kakashi had felt the same way his whole life too. As a boy, he seemed to have pushed everyone away believing that he was the problem. Tsuru wondered how many times Kakashi too woke up a lone in the hospital without anyone by his side.

"What if I said that I would be there?" Tsuru offered.

Immediately, Koyubi's face brightened.

"Of course," Tsuru started, "I can't be there physically for you every time, but you can always think of me and count on me. I'm in this hospital all the time anyways."

"I-I couldn't ask you to do that much," Koyubi muttered apologetically.

Tsuru placed her had softly on top of Koyubi's head and said, "It's something anyone and everyone deserves."

Soon Tsuru exited Koyubi's room very clearly late for her appointment. It didn't really matter though. Tsuru never wanted to go the appointment anyways. It's usually waiting upon more waiting and petty procedures that made her uncomfortable.

"You're really something Tsuru-san," Tsuru turned around to see her nurse, Ayame. "Koyubi's been having tantrums lately and no one could control her."

"She just needs someone who understands," Tsuru noted. "I'm pretty late my appointment, right?"

"Don't worry about it," Ayame reassured. "We'll reschedule you for tomorrow."

"Thanks." Just as Tsuru was about to leave, Ayame stopped her.

"Actually!"Ayame spoke loudly. "You don't have a job, right?"

"Um."

"Sorry, no. I didn't mean it like- Do you want to work here?"

"Here?"

"In daycare, maybe. The kids could really use someone like you."

"Wow that's-"

"The pay won't be bad! It's not amazing, but you'll get a lot of benefits! And the responsibilities aren't too big. Just comfort, care, provide food, you know… things like that."

"I was going to say that's an amazing offer and yes."

"Yes?"

"I'll work here."

Ayame grew ecstatic and threw herself around Tsuru in a tight hug whilst jumping up and down. Totally inappropriate of a nurse especially to their patient.

Tsuru sat across from Kakashi at their dinner date spot of the night. The menu was cold soba with a side of tempura. Of course, Tsuru stole from Kakashi's since he's always so keen on maintaining his figure.

"I realized you still haven't officially met the team yet," Kakashi conversed. "You should swing by tomorrow."

"You're finally letting me meet the team!" Tsuru exclaimed with her mouth full with noodles.

"Letting you?" Kakashi sounded offended. "You could come at any time if that's what you wanted."

"I was just waiting for the offer," Tsuru pouted.

Kakashi chuckled at the silly girl whose face suddenly turned.

"Oh," Tsuru started, "wait. I actually have something tomorrow."

"Oh?"

"Yea. I missed my appointment today, so I have to go tomorrow and the hospital asked me to start working at their daycare."

"What?"

"Yea, it's nothing big just kid stuff." Bright red flushed across Tsuru's cheeks. Kakashi had never seen her so shy about something. A warmth washed over his chest in endearment.

"That's amazing!" Kakashi commended. "Congratulations!"

Tsuru perked up at the sound of his praise and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. The woman returned to her food happily.

Kakashi ended up chivalrously paying for the meal after joking that Tsuru should pay for the whole meal with her newfound income. It was a special night full of laughter and petty fights even as they walked the streets together. He didn't hold her hand much and she seemed to be fine with that. The two never really displayed affection publicly which made Kakashi wonder if that was something she actually wanted.

In fact, as the two made their way home, Kakashi realized he had never really asked what Tsuru had wanted. He hadn't considered things like if she wanted to hold hands in public or wear matching items of clothing like normal young couples did. Kakashi hadn't even asked her if she wanted to meet his team of genin until that night.

"Tsuru," Kakashi's voice was serious which made Tsuru concerned. "Is there anything you want? You know, from me?"

"What you mean?" Tsuru stopped walking to face the man. She looked up at him with a raised brow.

"I just hope I'm not demanding so much from you," Kakashi continued. "If you want something from me, I want you to tell me. Even if it's something as simple as…holding hands."

Kakashi noticed Tsuru hesitate for a moment making his heart stop in nervousness. To his surprise, she burst out in hysterical laughter. Tsuru doubled over and hit Kakashi on his arm multiple times. She grasped his shoulder while trying to calm herself down from her high and faced him once. They matched eyes momentarily but she fell back into yet another fit of laughs clutching her stomach.

"I-I'm sorry," she said through panting breaths. "I just didn't expect that from you!"

Kakashi bashfully scratched his cheek.

"I just never pegged you for the type of person who would want to display affection publicly," Tsuru responded. "But I honestly don't really care about holding hands in public! Kakashi-kun, it's enough that I have you."

Tsuru placed a hand on Kakashi's cheek and leaned up to place a kiss on it. How she had a way with people. Anyone. Kakashi really wanted his kids to meet her now. Especially Sasuke and Naruto. The two boys had gone too long without a mother's touch or a parent in general and Kakashi would know better than anyone else how empty that is.

Before Tsuru knew it, Kakashi's face was bare and kissing her. Butterflies erupted in her stomach and she returned the chaste kiss. Their fingers loosely laced between each other and their lips moved slowly. It was hard to remember where the two were standing for Tsuru when Kakashi's free hand found its way into her hair. Tingles spread throughout her scalp as he lightly tugged her head back to deepen the kiss. Tsuru let her other wrap around his neck pulling herself closer to his body.

Suddenly his mouth wasn't on hers. She looked into his one gray eye that had a different look of longing to it. It was a gaze that was more entrancing that his other red eye that he kept hidden. Then it clicked that the two were still out. While there wasn't anyone around them, they were still out.

Kakashi cleared his breath and pulled his mask back over his nose. "Sorry that was…"

"It was good," Tsuru was a little breathless. She wasn't exactly sure what she was feeling but she wasn't sure if she hated it either. She could only guess.

"Well I guess," Kakashi said, "I should go home."

"Or," Tsuru stopped him. "You could come home with me."

Kakashi's breath hitched. The two had spent a few nights together in each other's beds already. Innocent nights. Why would this one be different?

"Do you want me to come home with you?" Kakashi asked trying to maintain his cool as best as possible. "Only if you want me to."

Tsuru looked around as if looking for her answer and looked at him once more. "I do want you to. I also do want to meet your students. I'm sure I'll find time off tomorrow."

"I think they'd like that a lot," Kakashi replied.

Kakashi throughout his life pursued selfish acts thinking that it was actually out of selflessness. How wrong he had been this whole time about the concept of true kindness. Of course having these sets of values and morals wouldn't change the fact that he was a trained killer. However, that didn't mean he couldn't learn from the best example. From someone who had more right than anyone else in the world to be selfish, but chose to give as much as she could instead.

He would make sure that that night, he would do everything in his power to give her everything she wanted.


	15. Chapter 15

HI everybody! This is really long, I highly encourage you to read this, but if you don't want to I cannot stop you.

So the last few weeks have been absolutely insane and I think I've had 100 mental breakdowns in the span of a week. I'm sure all of you know about the current COVID19 pandemic. Due to this pandemic many college students are being displaced from their own schools. Schools such as Harvard, Princeton, and Brown are forcing students to move out of their campuses in a span of less than a week. On top of that, rumors are circulating that New York borders will soon close and international airports may shut down temporarily (these are all rumors and I cannot confirm this to be true). I am unfortunately one of those people who is being moved from their schools with nowhere to go as home for me is abroad. This is an immensely stressful time for everyone, not just college students, and I wanted to take this time to highlight that.

COVID19 is NOT a small deal. It's a big deal. Of course, young and healthy people probably will not die if they come in contact with the virus. However, the elderly, the weak, and young children CAN suffer. In the current status quo, hospitals in Northern Italy are having to make decisions on who gets to live and who will ultimately die as resources are low and there is NO CURE as this is a new strain of coronavirus. Yes, the mortality rate is lower than that of SARS and MERS, but COVID19 has already killed and infected more people than either diseases. Please keep this in mind, please refrain from travel unless completely necessary, wash your hands, stay clean, wear masks, be healthy.

Speaking of masks, please do not be fooled by false information. You can find out on the World Health Organization site why, when, and how face masks can be necessary. At this time, since the US has not taken better precautionary measures, you really do not know who could be carrying the disease and experts claim COVID has gone "unchecked" in the US for weeks. However, I would also like to acknowledge the shortage on masks and in the current climate the sick and those who are near the sick need them more. If you are able to have masks, don't hoard them but just take a few for when you do need to travel or must go to crowded places. If you still believe masks are just an East Asian thing and I cannot change your mind, please still refrain from bullying and making racist remarks. People of East Asian descent have been facing increased racism left and right whether or not they are wearing masks. Even news sources like the NYTimes seem to be adopting a racist perspective... If you are unaware of this situation or any things about COVID19, I'd be happy to send articles. Keeping informed is critical now more than ever. I may not be a credible source myself, but I do have very credible sources and a wide range of perspectives.

While many are dying and many more are being infected, I also want to note that in Wuhan more people have recovered than have passed away! The situation in countries like China, Hong Kong, South Korea, and Japan are beginning to quiet as every civilian feels their civic duty to prevent the disease from spreading. My own mother has not left her home in weeks because she feels that everyone needs to do their part during this time. There are people who depend on public transportation to get something as simple as food and water. Do not put these people at risk and limit your ability to travel as best as possible and stay out of crowded areas!

While I truly do not understand the sentiment to capitalize on cheap flights and travel abroad for spring break, I do not want to end this on completely negative. While I am struggling to find a place to live, I am extremely privileged to be able to afford different options and to have amazing people in my community to help me. And I can't help but feel awful for those who cannot afford such luxuries. So I want to emphasize that now is not the time to be thinking about the economy, conspiracy theories, or fighting one another. Economies and businesses will recover. We can prove our suspicions after we've taken care of everyone and the world is healthy again. Right now, we just need everyone to do their part as a global citizen. It's not about you as an individual anymore, but about everyone. It's about low income families who cannot afford healthcare. It's about those in detention camps who do not have resources to fight this disease. It's about the countries where people cannot move with government lockdowns in place.

There is so much more I want to say about this issue, but I think I've already said too much. I'm not sorry if I wasted your time because everyone needs to care about this. If you have something bad to say, just don't say it. But if you need support during this time, I can try and help provide emotional support! It's a distressing time for us all, but if Britney Spears got through 2007 then we can get through this too!

Thank you guys so much if you read this whole thing and I hope you enjoy this messy chapter.

* * *

_A/N: WARNING: Moderate Sexual Content_

* * *

Kakashi woke up to Tsuru's sleeping face. Strands of light blonde hair fell across her face so he tucked them back. He should have felt vulnerable without his mask or his clothes for that matter, but he was comfortable. Maybe it was because the sun hadn't risen yet and the dark was covering up anything that could be exposed.

It made him giddy just thinking about the actions that had transpired just hours before. How he asked so many times if she was okay because he felt like his weight could potentially crush her bones. How she seemed to grow more timid as each layer of clothing found its way carelessly tossed in unknown spaces of the room. The way his name whispered from her lips.

_"__Kakashi-kun,"_ _Tsuru moaned softly. _

_Kakashi felt heat radiating from her neck as he bit and sucked on sweet spots of her flesh. Her fingers were clutching on to his hair keeping him close. Kakashi's hand glazed over her waist up to the side of her bare breast and back down her thigh. _

Kakashi wanted to relive it all over again.

_RING RING! _Tsuru shot up into sitting position and buried her head in her hand tiredly and groaned. Her upper body was still naked and while it didn't quite register for her yet, Kakashi took that time to admire her. When she noticed Kakashi staring she pulled the blanket over her chest.

"That's no fair," Kakashi said defeated.

"Well you certainly don't like to play fair," Tsuru argued remembering all the things Kakashi did the night before to make her red even then.

_Kakashi had a grip on her wrists with both hands above her head. She squirmed beneath him as his free hand dipped between her thighs._

_"__Be still," Kakashi commanded into her ear. "I promise it'll feel so much better if you do."_

As mean as he could be, Kakashi was also extremely considerate.

_"__Is this okay?" Kakashi asked as he lowered himself between her legs. "Let me know if anything's uncomfortable."_

_Before she could protest or agree, waves of pleasure washed through her body._

It just made it all the more unfair. How was he good at this? Good at everything? So extremely good.

"I should get ready," Tsuru announced. "I still have a check up and acupuncture session."

"What about breakfast?" Kakashi asked with a suggestive tone. He grasped Tsuru's arm and pulled her back down into the sheets. Kakashi leaned over his skin touching her's. And there was that magical blush again.

Tsuru abruptly rose from out of the sheets and said, "I'm taking a shower!" Then, she rushed off into her bathroom. Kakashi raised an eyebrow confused at if he had just been rejected, but then she shuffled her way back into the room to say, "You can join me if you want to…"

Kakashi chuckled at her inability to make eye contact and decided he had teased her enough, "Just get ready."

Tsuru smiled at the man who was still comfortable in her sheets and retreated back into her bathroom. Kakashi, though tempted by the offer to get in the shower with Tsuru, decided he would give a level of some privacy. After all, he wasn't all too sure where her mental state exactly was, so the best thing he could do was make sure that she felt comfortable.

The man put his pants, tank, and mask back on and made his way into the kitchen. Kakashi rummaged through the fridge for various ingredients and clicked the stove on. A little bit of olive oil, salt, pepper, and a spritz of lemon. Sizzling sounds filled the kitchen and the most delightful smell.

Kakashi's sharp eyes heard Tsuru's shower water turn off. Soon she appeared in the doorway in her robe and her hair wrapped in a towel.

"Smells so good!" she cheered. "Kakashi-kun I didn't know you could cook!"

"It's a good skill to have," Kakashi commented. "Sit. It'll be ready soon."

Tsuru obeyed eagerly. In a few minutes, Kakashi placed in front of her a grilled fish with vegetables on the side, a bowl of white rice, and miso soup. Tsuru's eyes lit up with excitement and she thank Kakashi before digging into her meal. The first almost brought tears to Tsuru's eyes.

She didn't remember much from her own childhood, but she recalled the rare moments her mother would cook for the family. Neither Hyo or Tsuru were passed down her mother's skills and often had to manage with mediocre tasting meals. But now this. This simple, delicate, homemade piece brought all those memories back. Tsuru put her chopsticks down.

"Does it taste bad?" Kakashi wondered.

"No," Tsuru said, "it's perfect. Everything you do feels perfect."

The sound of her voice was a little despondent. Kakashi took Tsuru's hands in his own. His hands were much larger than her's to the point it almost felt like she was a child.

Breakfast went on silently. The two got ready together and parted ways. Tsuru to her job and Kakashi to his. Tsuru was stubborn and didn't want to admit all of her insecurities. She was determined that she would execute her job _perfectly_.

Tsuru went about the first half her day seeing to the procedures she had missed the day before. Doctor after doctor. Everything seemed to be going fine. She was healthy or at least as healthy as she could be in her given situation.

There were so many things rushing through her mind as she raced up and down the corridors trying to perform one task after the next. Both personal and for work. Nurses would grab her roughly and pull her to different rooms to get her acquainted with all nooks and crannies of the hospital unknown to the average patient. It was difficult to absorb especially when thoughts from the previous night with Kakashi dominated her brain.

_Kakashi had Tsuru trapped between his arms. One hand held her thigh to his waist as he rocked his body back and forth. Her body was addicting and he called out-_

_"_Tsuru-san!" The nurse Ayame yelled.

Tsuru shook her head bringing herself back to reality.

"Sorry, Ayame-san," Tsuru apologized. "I've been a little out of it lately."

Ayame sighed and smiled, "That's alright. I know this is a lot, but I think we can actually get you started on the job now."

A smile formed on Tsuru's face excitedly. Ayame guided Tsuru to the daycare where Tsuru was met with the tiniest human beings playing with building blocks and stuffed animals. It was the most colorful room had ever seen in the sterile hospital. This place was adorned in soft pinks, baby blues, and pale yellows. Occasionally there were pops of lime green and vibrant red.

"Hey everyone!" Ayame said to the kids.

"Good afternoon, Ayame-sensei!" the children greeted back in unison.

"We have a new sensei here for guys!" Ayame gestured at Tsuru.

"O-oh," Tsuru stammered momentarily before putting on her brightest, friendliest smile. "I'm Tsuru! Nice to meet everybody!"

The room was awkwardly silent. The kids seemed to not take too well to strangers. Tsuru nervously laughed and Ayame put a hand on her shoulder.

"Good luck!" Ayame said quickly and rushed out of the door leaving Tsuru behind in discomfort.

There were so many things to do. Too many for one person to handle. First of all, everyone had to get their lunch at the same time Tsuru ate her lunch. However, someone would call her over every ten seconds for something new. Eventually there was no time for her to eat her own food as the next task involved playing. Tsuru had to entertain three different cliques at once and manage a fight between two others.

"This is all Tsuru-sensei's fault!" one child pointed their finger at the woman. "If _she_ had never come here we wouldn't be fighting! She's the reason everything's off with us!"

"Huh?!" Tsuru exclaimed at the audacity of these children who had just made her the enemy.

So much for the perfect day at work… Tsuru was excused from her job a little early while she wanted to make her way back home, she recalled that she had promised Kakashi that she would meet his students. Unfortunately, she wasn't so sure how many more young people she could handle.

On her way to the training grounds, Tsuru felt her vision blur. She just needed to sit down for a second. It was just a moment of dizziness nothing more. Luckily, there was a stone bench on the side of the road. Tsuru buried her head in her hands and stayed still.

"You said that she would come!" a loud boy shouted. "I wanted to meet her!"

"Well," it was Kakashi. Oh, God. Tsuru felt her heart sink, but she was much too disoriented to move. "She's probably busy today. Anyways, I'll see you all tomorrow at 7AM sharp!"

"Yessir!" Naruto saluted before mumbling. "He's probably gonna be late…"

It wasn't long before Kakashi caught sight of Tsuru sitting alone at the bench. Kakashi rushed over to his feeble lover. Her head hung lower when he kneeled with strong hands placed on her shoulders. His students had never seen their "too cool" sensei show any amount of panic for anything.

"S-sorry," Tsuru apologized. "I wasn't planning on meeting your students like this."

"Is everything okay?" Kakashi asked.

Tsuru didn't reply.

"You have to talk to me," Kakashi said sternly. "What's wrong?"

The woman gave a mere one word answer, "Dizzy."

"Do you need me to take you to the hospital?"

"No."

Kakashi sighed and took a seat beside the girl with a hand on her back. His hand moved soothingly back and forth. Slowly, all of Tsuru's anxieties began to fade when she felt the subtle waves of chakra from his fingertips. He was always strangly gentle. How could he be so good at everything?

"It's not fair," Tsuru whispered.

Kakashi raised his brows.

"You're so good at everything," Tsuru raised her head slightly to reveal a deep blush and tears welled up in the corners of her eyes.

"What do you mean?" Kakashi asked.

"Everything!" Tsuru exclaimed in pure frustration. "You're so good at the whole 'boyfriend' thing and I feel like I can't do anything right!"

"Tsuru?" Kakashi said her name softly.

"What?"

"Look at me."

Before Tsuru could register that Kakashi's mask had flown off his face, his lips were pressed up against hers in a sweet kiss. He then pushed his forehead into hers and looked straight into her stormy eyes.

"While I am glad you think so highly of me," he began to say with a playful smile, "you shouldn't forget all the awful things I've already done to you."

"But I want to give you as much as you give me," the woman responded stubbornly. "I've just always wanted to do something with my life and give it my all, but I feel like I just can't do anything right.

Even now, you're doing everything right and I still can't stop complaining."

"After everything you've been through, don't you think you deserve everything? That you deserve nothing short of perfection?

To be honest, I'm not very good at expressing myself. I don't say very meaningful things. It's hard for me to say things like '_I love you.'_ So, if I can't say it, I can at least show it."

A siren went off in Tsuru's head.

"What did you say?" Tsuru brought her question out to surface. "Did you just say that you loved me?"

Tsuru saw sheer panic and splash across his pale skin causing her to giggle. Kakashi frantically tried defending himself. The man waved his hands in front of himself while saying things like "I-I didn't mean to spring that up on you so quickly! I thought you probably knew!" He clearly didn't like being in such a vulnerable position

"Kakashi-kun," Tsuru injected lovingly. "I love you too."

So maybe it was okay that Tsuru wasn't the perfect person. The unlikely pair were perhaps just two pieces missing for each other. Each mismatched feature made to balance one another. He was always so sound, rational, and confident. Kakashi relied on facts to come to conclusions. Tsuru was compassionate and sought to understand people and their feelings.

Kakashi recalled their conversation the night before as the two lied in bed together skin touching skin and both breathless.

"Kakashi-kun," Tsuru began.

"Mm?" Kakashi's voice was content.

"Do ever think about time?"

"What do you mean?"

"Time we have left in this world."

Kakashi hesitated. He didn't like this topic very much. "Yes and no. My greatest regret in life is thinking and re-thinking my past. Everything I've done wrong. Everything I've lost. All of it, I've come to overanalyze. Frankly, I have to admit, that I still do. Back when I was younger, and subconsciously now, I try to fix all those things. Yet, the future is something I've accepted that can't be predicted.

Tsuru raised her brows in mild astonishment. It was an answer that she hadn't expected from Kakashi—the hard edged man who once tried to control all aspects of his life.

"You've changed," Tsuru noted.

"Have I?" Kakashi asked. "I think I've always been this way, it just took a while to get to this place."

"How very philosophical," Tsuru giggled as she drew circles across Kakashi's chest. "I guess I can't help but think about all the things I can and can't have. The dreams that will never be achieved and aspirations that will never be fulfilled. Yet, I've come to accept those things as a part of my life and to be happy with now. I have everything I do need and I don't need to ask for more even if I really want to."

"It's always okay to want things even if you can't have them. I don't believe in things like fate or miracles, but I believe that life will surprise you. If there's something you want, you'll find yourself still chasing after it and maybe, without you even knowing it, you'll get what you've always truly wanted."


	16. Chapter 16

Waking up next to Tsuru always felt like a blessing. While Kakashi always prioritized his health and figure, sleep wasn't always an enjoyable luxury in his life. Often times his sleep would be heavily disrupted by visions and dreams reflecting his traumas and incapabilities. However, recently, things changed. He wasn't sure if it was because his lifestyle as a jonin leader was much less gruesome or if it was how Tsuru slept so peacefully beside him.

How her small, petite body melded into his with her head tucked snuggly under his chin. How Tsuru's hair smelled like blossoms and peaches. How her milky skin felt under his bare touch. Even the scars from surgeries scattered over various places on her body brought him a level of ease that he couldn't quite explain.

The sun had come up, but Kakashi had little will to leave the sleeping beauty's side. So, he just laid there stroking her icy hair and running his fingers up and down her naked back. It felt like the two were stuck in a beautiful limbo full of love, sex, and pure bliss.

Kakashi grazed the purple marks he had territorially left on Tsuru's collarbone with his lips and teeth finally stirring her awake. He felt Tsuru moan softly and try to pull away, but he tightened his grip and continued to kiss the sensitive spots he had bruised from the night before.

"Kakashi, stop," Tsuru protested, but her light giggles said other wise. "What time is it?"

"You don't have work today," Kakashi noted. "So why do you care?" His head disappeared under the blanket as he his mouth attached itself to her breast. Tsuru's fingers laced into's Kakashi's hair and brought the man back to look her in her half-lidded eyes.

"Because you have work," Tsuru reminded.

"They can live without me," Kakashi argued.

"I want to meet them," Tsuru pouted. He just wanted to lay there and kiss those plump pink lips all day, but reality made him groan in despair.

"I want a break," Kakashi whined. It was rare to see Kakashi relaxed to this extent. He was always laid-back, but the man rarely let his guard down and strayed from routine. "But I guess you're right. It's almost nine."

"Kakashi!" Tsuru whacked the man over his head. "You were supposed to meet your team hours ago!"

Suddenly, Tsuru found her on her back with Kakashi on top pinning her wrists down by her head. Kakashi smiled at Tsuru's red face. She always got so bashful when he acted dominantly. "But I'm the teacher. They'll do what I say no matter what time I show up." Kakashi leaned down into Tsuru's ear. "Will you do what I say?" Tsuru's breath hitched and her legs began rubbing together in an attempt to cool the heat forming in between.

As soon as it all began it ended. Kakashi pulled the covers off and rolled out of bed. He stretched his back and said, "I'll make breakfast and get ready after you." Tsuru couldn't bear to watch the man pull up a pair of fresh boxers and coyly leave the bedroom. Kakashi had left her on the edge and frustrated. It was always like this. Kakashi had so much control over Tsuru in these situations and would often push her to the point of wanton begging. He relished in it.

Even the way Kakashi made breakfast without a shirt on was his way of teasing her, but today he decided to at least throw on one of her pink floral aprons. It was a silly sight and brought laughter to the room making the man turn.

She was so beautiful in her high waisted green skirt and white tank top. Today, Tsuru pinned back the front pieces of her blonde hair giving her a bit of a lovely childish appearance that suited her well. Kakashi couldn't help but leave his station and bring the woman in for a short but deep kiss.

"I'll plate the food," Tsuru whispered against his lips. "Go get ready."

Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke all stood around the green field of the training grounds. They went from standing to sitting to sleeping over the the few hours their sensei remained missing. This atypical cycle became Team 7's routine. Waiting and waiting for the man who was supposed to be their role-model jonin leader.

"Hey guys," Kakashi's deep, lazy voice finally came through.

"You're la-" Sakura began to yell until she saw a woman at Kakashi's side. Sakura's eyes widened as the realization hit that it was the same woman that seemed royally pissed off at Kakashi weeks ago.

"Everyone, this is Tsuru," Kakashi introduced. "Tsuru…Everyone."

"So she _is _your girlfriend?" Naruto pointed an accusatory finger at Kakashi who defensively raised his hands.

"Well, something like that." Tsuru's eyes narrowed at Kakashi's shy response and jumped up to whack him over the head again.

"Sorry guys," Tsuru said sweetly. "I guess Kakashi-kun isn't used to the label."

Naruto and Sakura smiled while Sasuke had a certain look that pretended to be uninterested.

Kakashi's group of genin were unbelievably adorable and Tsuru smiled the whole day even though all she did was sit and watch them fumble around trying to land a hit on Kakashi.

"C'mon guys," Kakashi egged his students. "Is this all you got? You guys have the chunin exams pretty soon. At this rate, the three of you will be the first to fail."

The three kids were exhausted, panting with their hands over their knees. Kakashi stood lively and chipper smiling down proudly at his three genin. Tsuru had slipped out of their training to go buy something nice for the team to eat during their lunch break.

"I bought some things for lunch!" Tsuru announced holding a few bags of food.

"Tsuru nee-chan you're the best!" Naruto cheered.

Tsuru had been given the day off of work, so she took the time to finally get to meet Kakashi's team of genin. All of them were so cute and certainly more welcoming than the demon children from the hospital daycare.

"So you and Kakashi-sensei are official?" Sakura, the girl with pink hair, exclaimed excitedly.

"Yup!" Tsuru responded with just as much cheer.

"Wow, I really thought sensei was going to die alone," Naruto chuckled deviously.

"Ah," Kakashi feigned hurt as his head dropped.

"How did you meet? When did you guys first kiss? I want to know it all!" Sakura squealed in excitement.

Kakashi gave Tsuru a pleading look which Tsuru reciprocated with a gentle, reassuring smile. The two had a long and complicated history that wasn't always pretty, but it those hurdles that made their trust and love even stronger.

"Let's just say that we kept bumping into each other," Tsuru responded. "Literally."

All three of the kids seemed to pout in disappointment, but they were good kids and dropped the subject. Kakashi sighed in relief and the five sat around and ate their meals together much like a family would.

Kakashi pulled Naruto and Sakura aside for basic refinement on combat techniques while Sasuke sat back beside Tsuru. From what Tsuru knew, Sasuke was a prodigy from the elite Uchiha clan that had been wiped out by Sasuke's own brother, Itachi Uchiha. Yes, Tsuru knew the tragic story.

"So, Sasuke-kun," Tsuru attempted to spark conversation with the quiet and cold boy. "I hear you're quite talented, graduating as the number rookie! Word about you has certainly gone around the village."

Sasuke simply respond, "Yeah. I guess." A short awkward pause followed, but Sasuke spoke up a little more. "It's not enough though. I need to become stronger." His dark eyes trailed up to the spunky, blonde boy who seemed to be arguing with his sensei for some reason. Sasuke's eyes narrowed with a fierce competitiveness.

"Is Naruto you're rival?" Tsuru asked.

Suddenly, Sasuke became defensive. "Tch, that loser? As if."

Tsuru giggled. "You know, you remind me a little bit of Kakashi-kun when he was younger. He was always kind of dark, sulky, gloomy, and arrogant." The adjectives seemed to rub Sasuke the wrong way as his face twitched in vexation. "Of course, I understand where all of it came from. Kakashi's been through so much." Tsuru fixated her stormy blue eyes on the gray haired man who was comedically sneering at something Naruto was saying. "Still, he's unconditionally kind and cares deeply for those around him. I think that's what makes him so strong. Even if I can't always be there for him, I want him to know that I he's the strongest person I'll ever know."

"Is that why you like him?" Sasuke asked. The questioned surprised Tsuru. Even in the short time frame she had known the Uchiha, this seemed uncharacteristic of him.

Tsuru's smile widened and she pat Sasuke on these top of his head which deepened his cute little displeased expression. "Yep! That and he's always been there for me even in my worst. Even in his worst. We've had a rocky relationship and he's done some pretty messed up things, but he never left.

Remember that, Sasuke! No matter what happens. No matter what path you choose to go down. If they care, they won't ever leave your side. You should always do the same. It's those bonds that make this life worth living."

Sasuke's face eased out of its initial frowning state and rose to his feet. "I shouldn't sit around for too long. I'm going to join the training." With that the black haired boy ran to start a spar with Naruto which was slightly uncalled for, but Kakashi seemed to have no objection to.

Tsuru resumed watched Kakashi referee the spar with Sakura at his side cheering Sasuke on. Everything felt so perfect.

Right then a sharp pain shot up into her chest and Tsuru felt a cough come up. She covered her mouth with a balled fist and tried to suppress the sound as much as possible so not to draw attention to herself. A metallic taste lingered in her mouth raising alarm within her. Tsuru pulled her hand away from her mouth to confirm the worst.

Blood.

_Calm down, _she told herself.

As quickly as possible, Tsuru whipped out a handkerchief and wiped away any trace of the red substance from her. Tsuru looked up to check if Kakashi had noticed. To her relief, he was too focused on the two boys throwing fists at each other. Tsuru sighed and put the handkerchief in one of the empty bento boxes from lunch to throw away. She gathered the trash and her belongings, deciding it was time to go home and rest.

The woman jumped to her feet and she began seeing stars, but forced herself to stay upright. Tsuru waved at the group and yelled, "I'm going to clean up and go home! Thanks for letting me join!"

The group yelled something incoherent as her ears buzzed with blood trying to circulate itself, but Tsuru was determined to walk as straight as possible without any support. In a few seconds, the vertigo subsided allowing her to function as normal but the nausea remained.

It certainly was not the first time Tsuru had coughed up blood. Of course, it was never a good sign and Hyo always took her to the hospital when it started happening. However, Tsuru did not want to go to the hospital for it anymore. Even if it meant more time on her watch, she didn't want it. She didn't want to burden Kakashi with the reminder that she was dying and that there was merely a year left for her in this world.

Tsuru felt it. She felt her life slowly slipping away from her and her will to keep fighting was shrinking. It was all only a matter of time. And, to be honest, it was okay. All Tsuru wanted was to see Kakashi's smiling face and cherish little moments with him as a normal person. She knew it was wrong of her to keep him in the dark. But if it meant more time to be human, then she hoped that he would understand

Steadily, Tsuru walked herself back to her home.


	17. Chapter 17

Work for Tsuru showed some improvement as she established a more concrete bond with the children. The most important thing to remember about kids was their fragile states of mind and impressive sensitivity. They, like adults, knew how to deflect pain which often manifested in bullying whether that was with each other or with authorities. How to deal with it? Always validate their feelings and make every feel heard. Tsuru knew that you could never feel safe without being heard.

However, it was always a fragile thing with these beings. Some had been diagnosed with the worst with life expectancies as short as thirteen years if everything went smoothly. The reality that these kids weren't safe was something they would have to deal with on a daily basis. The least Tsuru could do was make sure that they all felt understood and they could still have a bit of good in their lives.

The children dressed down in white hospital gowns were laid across the colorful, soft padded floor wrapped up in an assortment of wonderfully patterned blankets—something Tsuru had urged the hospital to buy for the kids. Their little cherub faces looked most peaceful in their sleep, but there was no telling the visions they were seeing behind their eyes. Tsuru could only hope that they saw something more beautiful.

A soft knock came from outside the doorframe of the entrance to the hospital daycare. Outside the open door was Kakashi who looked endearingly at the woman who was kneeling before a child with her delicate fingers grazing their babyish faces. Tsuru immediately perked up and quietly hopped outside.

"Kakashi-kun!" she yelped in a soft whisper.

"Thought I could bring you something to eat," Kakashi said holding up a white plastic bag.

It was a relatively healthy meal. Eel over rice and some red bean filled mochi for desert. The sweet paste and sticky texture chewed delightfully between her teeth. Kakashi learned quickly mochi was one of Tsuru's favorite foods. Cold udon was her first. She loved loved food, but sometimes would forget that she needed to eat which would make her shake like a wet cat. Tsuru slept early and could stay in bed until noon if she had nothing planned for the day which were the best days for Kakashi where he could just keep her trapped between his arms.

"So, the chunin exams start tomorrow, right?" Tsuru asked.

"Yeah," Kakashi replied. "I think all of them are ready. Of course, I don't expect all of them to become chunin so soon. They're only rookies, but I'm still optimistic."

"I hope they all do well," Tsuru said. "When did you become a chunin, Kakashi-kun?"

"Me?" Kakashi paused to think for a second. "When I was six."

Tsuru stopped chewing a piece of pink mochi and blinked trying to process the information. Six years old?

"I was born in a time of war, Tsuru," Kakashi explained. "The nation was desperate."

"And you became an ANBU captain at sixteen." Tsuru was in a bit of disbelief at Kakashi astonishingly early success. She had heard of Kakashi's strength and prodigious skills, but she didn't believe that being a genius should warrant succession through military ranks.

"Jonin at thirteen before that," Kakashi informed.

Tsuru frowned. "No child should have to fight in a war."

Kakashi reached out and cradled the side of Tsuru's small face in one hand. "The war is over now and I'm still here." Tsuru wondered what kind of smile was lingering behind that mask.

After work, Tsuru took the time to catch up with Kakashi and his team on their last day of practice before the first round of the chunin exams. Tsuru loved Kakashi's team and she had a particular liking for Sasuke. The Uchiha was a lot like Kakashi when Kakashi was younger with that bad boy front that ladies seemed to swoon over.

Tsuru sat back with Sakura who couldn't take her her glimmering green eyes of the black-haired boy as he sparred with Naruto. Sakura cheered Sasuke's name from the sidelines which only seemed to rile up Naruto more. Clearly there was a young and messy love triangle thing going on here.

"So when's the wedding?" Tsuru teased the pink haired girl who blushed.

"W-w-what?" she exclaimed at Tsuru's assertion.

"You and Sasuke," Tsuru furthered. "When's the wedding?"

Sakura tumbled over words trying to figure out what to say.

Tsuru giggled, "I'm just playing with you, Sakura! It's nice to be in love, right?"

Sakura's expression became despondent, "It's not really love if he doesn't like me back though…It's not like you and Kakashi-sensei."

"You're twelve, Sakura!" Tsuru's laughter seemed to put Sakura into a state of humiliation.

"H-hey!"

"Sorry, I'm not trying to invalidate your feelings or anything! I'm glad you think Kakashi and I have something special because we do. That doesn't mean things can't happen for you too. It's just when you're young, everything is a first. No need to think of it so seriously. Besides, things can always change. Maybe one day, you'll fall in love with another great guy who's not Sasuke. Then, Sasuke will realize what he missed and fall in love with you."

"That sounds like hell."

"That's just life."

"Did you like someone before Kakashi-sensei?"

"Oh, there were a few dates here and there. Nothing really worth noting. I was a little reckless back then though. I just did things because I didn't know when it would all end. I was just scared."

"I can definitely relate to being scared…"

"Why would you be scared, Sakura? You're a tough woman who's about to enter the chunin exams as a rookie!"

"Yeah…But I'm nothing like Sasuke-kun or Naruto. I'm just a girl."

Tsuru opened her mouth to scold Sakura, but was interrupted by Kakashi who clapped his hands together.

"Alright!" the man yelled. "The winner is Sasuke!"

The spar had ended when Sasuke cleverly bound Naruto's feet causing the boy to fall over with his butt stuck up in the air. Sasuke was of an elite clan. His skills were, as expected, above average. One could even call him a prodigy. Tsuru envisioned a much younger Kakashi going through the same kind of training as Sasuke for the exact same test. She then imagined Kakashi at Sasuke's age preparing to become a jonin.

Tsuru's deep ocean eyes shifted to Kakashi. It made her overwhelmingly sad that the man had no sense of childhood and adolescence. His entire past was defined by war traumas and indescribable loss. Then she suddenly waltzed into his life demanding to be treated a certain way at a time when he wasn't even giving himself an ounce of fair treatment.

"I'll get you back next time, Sasuke!" Naruto shouted as he began undoing the tight not between his ankles.

"Get through the first round of the exams first," Sasuke scoffed. "Dumbass."

"What was that?" Naruto jumped up to his feet in anger only to fall off balance again. Sakura giggled at Naruto's clumsiness while Kakashi rolled his eye.

"You heard me," Sasuke pushed. "You probably won't even get through the first part of the exam and if you do it won't be with your own strength."

"You're going to regret what you're saying!"

"Yeah? Then prove it!" Sasuke got back into a fighting stance.

Tsuru silenced the group when she walked over to the darker haired boy. The team eyed the woman with confusion. Tsuru wasn't one who inserted herself into their training, so this was surprising.

The woman raised her hand to Sasuke's forehead and flicked it.

"Argh!" Sasuke exclaimed. Sakura gasped and Naruto chortled. "What was that for?"

Tsuru flicked Sasuke again.

"What the hell?" Sasuke complained. "Quit it!"

"Now, now," Tsuru said in a scolding tone. "Is that any way to speak to your elder?"

Sasuke made an annoyed face which nearly earned him another flick on his reddening forehead. "Okay, okay! I'm sorry! Just stop flicking me!"

Tsuru lowered her hand and smiled. "Good. Now apologize to Naruto. You guys are one team, you should be rooting each other on."

"What?" Sasuke said in disbelief.

"Tsuru nee-san," Sakura whined. "They're just boys being boys! There's no need to reprimand them."

"Boys just being boys?" Tsuru repeated questioningly. "I don't believe in that kind of thing. You all are training to become chunin who are as reliable as they are skilled. You should be demonstrating that in your daily lives too and how you treat each other. How can I rely on you guys to save me when I'm in trouble if you're just going to fight each other like this?"

Sasuke turned his back on the whole group hiding away his face. His body tensed and he clenched his two fists at his sides. Finally he said, "Sorry. I might have taken it too far."

Naurto's eyes widened and responded, "Uh…Yeah…Thanks."

Kakashi walked over to Tsuru's side and placed a hand on the small of her back as a thankful gesture.

"Alright everyone!" Kakashi said. "Go home and get some rest. You have a lot coming for you starting tomorrow. I believe in you guys."

The three genin gave their sensei determined nods, but Tsuru noticed how Sakura's eyes seemed to waver with uncertainty. Life for a woman in such an industry would always be rough. While kunoichi were respected, they were still expected to perform as women in society. To be strong in battle, but delicate in life. To serve, but to never outshine a man. To live and survive, but only to give birth and raise children. It was an existence riddled with dualities and confusing contradictions.

Kakashi and Tsuru sat on the railing of a bridge with their feet dangling over rushing water. It was a nice spot to watch the sun set.

"Hey, Kakashi-kun," Tsuru called out to her lover. "Will Sakura be okay in the chunin exams? She seems unsure of herself."

"She'll be fine," Kakashi responded rather dismissively.

Tsuru shot the man a disappointed look. "You only want to her go so that Naruto and Sasuke can make it into the exams, huh? That's how it works, right? You can't participate unless you have the whole team there!" Kakashi was taken aback by the accusation.

"Don't tell me how to be a teacher, Tsuru," Kakashi warned. "It's not your place."

"Why because I'm a woman?"

"Because you're not a ninja." This again. It was always this. "I don't expect you to understand, Tsuru, because you can't. You'll never understand this world I live in. That _my students_ live in."

"This goes beyond understanding the kind of world _you _live in. It's about the world _you _perpetuate."

"I don't know what you're accusing me of, but I treat my students fairly."

"So Sakura-"

"Sakura, is the brightest kunoichi of her class. She has untapped potential, but it's a fact that she isn't as strong as Sasuke or Naruto. That doesn't mean I don't believe in her any less."

"That doesn't mean she can't be as strong as them."

"I'm not saying that!" Tsuru jumped at Kakashi's raised voice.

Kakashi closed his eyes and hung his forehead in the palm of his hand. "They're a lot of like what _we _used to be. What my team was like when I was a kid. The team is like a manifestation of my mistakes like some god is giving me a chance to fix things. Sakura, she's just a lot like…"

"Rin." Tsuru finished it for him.

"Rin," he affirmed.

Tsuru took his face out of his hand and brought her forehead to his. She looked into that gray eye that looked dull with an old tiredness that never seemed to go away. "Kakashi, they aren't them. They're different." She held one of his hands in her's, while her other hand stroked the back of his head.

Kakashi squeezed her thin hand. "I know. I'm sorry."

The soothing touch of Tsuru's fingers in his hair left to pull his mask down. She pressed her pink lips against his. Kakashi let his own free hand cradle her head and draw circles on the side of her ivory cheek.

He couldn't ask for anything better because Kakashi knew that he didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve happiness or love. It was selfish of him to let her love him the way she did. Unconditionally. He had done so much wrong in life and to her.

The yolky sun started to dip between the dark green hills in the distance. Kakashi and Tsuru parted but looked at each other with never-ending passion.

Kakashi remembered how she looked that night three years ago at the top of the Hokage's mountain. Sweat matting her hair to her face and her blue eyes sparkled with sheer excitement. How determined she was to climb to the top with those trembling legs. She was stronger than anyone gave her credit for. More daring and willing to approach things head on than anyone could see. A woman with no care for those who looked down on her for who she was. A woman who dared to love with no boundaries. He was more than lucky to have her even if their time was limited.

Time was ticking.

However, there under the fading sky, as he looked into those glass eyes and stroked her silvery blonde hair…That feeling…It was eternal.


	18. Chapter 18

Naruto sat wallowing in the realization that he had not paid nearly enough attention in his classes at the Academy. He couldn't recall even the most basic formulas of trigonometry or mathematics for that matter. What were these problems that demanded him to find where a kunai knife would land if thrown at this particular angle at this specific velocity?

He could feel his teammates, Sasuke and Sakura, seething. Their anger directed straight at him. Naruto felt lasers burn through him from wherever they were situated in the classroom. Worst of all, cheating was not an option. He was reminded of that fact as the chunin proctors lined the sides of the walls. Their incessant sound of pens jotting against clipboards as they recorded who was cheating. So many people were receiving strikes.

At the front of the classroom was the looming Ibiki Morino. A jonin. The main examiner. His presence was dark and sent cold shivers throughout Naruto's body. Ibiki was the kind of man Naruto did _not_ want to cross.

What could he do?

Tsuru rested her head against Kakashi's shoulder with her eyes closed serenely enjoying the gentle noises of daytime. Kakashi sighed as he leaned back on the park bench. He put his orange book down into his lap and looked up at the fluffy white clouds.

Tsuru stirred from her peaceful silence and looked up at her boyfriend. She asked, "Is something wrong?"

"It's just the proctor for the first exam is Ibiki Morino," Kakashi replied. "He's not your average guy. He's a jonin who specializes in torture and interrogation."

"Is that even allowed?" Tsuru remarked with a disturbed look on her face. Her face relaxed. "Are you worried about your students?"

"No actually," Kakashi replied. "I'm not worried about them necessarily. I have absolute faith that they'll be able to handle whatever's thrown at them. Otherwise, I wouldn't have let them participate at all. I am troubled by the kind of stunt Ibiki might pull though."

Tsuru's face finally relaxed into a smile. Over the past few days she came to realize how far Kakashi had come in life. He would never admit it, but Kakashi was full of love to give to those he cared for. Kakashi also had a kind of unspoken pride in his three students.

"It can't be all that inhumane!" Tsuru reassured.

"You'd be surprised," Kakashi said. "Frankly, I'm one of the more normal ones, but there really are some psycho people out there. Don't get me started on Anko Mitarshi…"

Tsuru's blood froze at the sound of the name.

"You know her?" Kakashi asked noticing Tsuru freeze.

"She escorted me back to the village from the remote rehabilitation center," Tsuru responded. "She's…scary…"

"Hah," Kakashi huffed. "You can say that again. She was trained by none other than Lord Orochimaru himself."

"One of the three legendary sannin? He betrayed and left the village, right?"

"Yup. I was one of the ones who had caught onto his schemes. Sick bastard that guy. I've never really regarded myself as the strongest shinobi, but I know who I am. Yet, in front of Orochimaru, I felt completely powerless as a ninja."

Kakashi got up from his seat and looked down at Tsuru tenderly. "That's enough of that depressing crap," he said. "Let's go on a stroll. The kids should be finishing up soon anyways." The man held out a gloved hand which Tsuru took happily.

It wasn't long before Kakashi and Tsuru found themselves at the testing center to greet the three genins that made up Team 7. The three had proud smiles plastered onto their faces indicating that the first part of the exam had gone successfully.

"Looks like things went well," Kakashi said.

Naruto chuckled with a toothy grin and hands on his hips. "Believe it!" Naruto shouted.

"Though I have to say, I almost thought we weren't going to make it through," Sakura admitted, "but I never doubted anyone. We're _the_ students of _the _Kakashi Hatake, after all!"

Kakashi laughed sheepishly at the compliment. The man didn't take to compliments very well. He was surprisingly humble and often gave himself too little credit for all the work he put into things.

"Naruto did give us a small scare," Sasuke explained. "But his thick-headedness actually saved us."

"Watch it, Sasuke!" Naruto yelled.

A hawk circled in the sky immediately catching Kakashi's eye. Having students often meant straying away from actual jonin level missions. Now that his genin were in the chunin exams that left time open for Kakashi to go on actual missions which the Hokage was clearly taking full advantage of.

The three students bickered amongst each other as Tsuru laughed over them. Kakashi leaned discretely into Tsuru's ear and whispered, "Sorry, I have to go. I'll see you tonight." Even before Tsuru could react or respond, Kakashi disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"Where'd Kakashi-sensei go?" Sakura asked.

"Ah, who cares?" Naruto stated putting his hands behind his head. "It's not like it's the first time he's done that."

"Well, you three must be tired," Tsuru said. "You guys should go home."

"No way!" Naruto yelled with ferver. "It's time to train! The second exam is just a week away and there's no time to lose!"

Sasuke smirked, "Finally something we can agree on."

Tsuru thought that her eyes were deceiving her when Sasuke and Naruto seemed to smile at each other fiery determination in their eyes. So, they did get along.

Satisfied, Tsuru stretched her arms upward and yawned loudly. "Ahhh! I guess there's no need for me here anymore. Good luck guys. All of you." Tsuru gave the three of them a gentle, motherly smile. Naruto beamed up at the fair lady and thought if this what his own mother would have smiled at him so proudly.

Feeling more restless than usual, Tsuru began traversing the village. In the distance she spotted two familiar figures through the fabric entrance of a tea shop. Deciding that it was best to intrude, Tsuru sneaked up behind the dark haired man.

"Well well, if it isn't my favorite couple in the village!" Tsuru greeted. Kurenai's red eyes lit up with excitement.

"Tsuru!" she yelped. "Come sit!"

Asuma seemed to pout with red stain painted across face at Tsuru's entrance.

"Why the sour face Asuma-san?" Tsuru taunted. "Did I come at a bad time?"

"Perfect time actually," Kurenai reassured while also seemingly rubbing it in Asuma's face. "Asuma's been going on about how he wants to have chi-"

"Kurenai!" Asuma's blush deepened as he stopped Kurenai from saying anything further. "That's private information!"

Kurenai raised one brow and gave the man an exasperated smile. Tsuru rocked back and further in her seat with her hands in lap observing the very happy couple who were obviously considering the next steps in their relationship. They were so predictable.

"Will there be a wedding soon then?" Tsuru insinuated further pushing Asuma into a state of absolute humiliation. "Or don't tell me, the baby shower's coming first?" Kurenai froze too. "I'm kidding! I'm kidding! Don't worry so much guys. I'm just jealous you two can have these concerns. I can't really give Kakashi anything like that."

The air around them suddenly became grim.

"Oh, sorry!" Tsuru laughed. "That was really depressing! I am truly happy for you two though. Truly." Tsuru was being more than genuine. Although the envy was real, she never wanted to see people unhappy. There was little space in her life for negativity anymore.

"Speaking of Kakashi," Asuma began changing the subject, "all nine of our rookie genin started the chunk exams today."

"Eh? Both your teams too?" Tsuru asked surprised. "This year's batch sure is strong."

"Yeah," Kurenai said proudly. "We can't expect any of them to achieve the chunin ranking, but it's always good to get a taste of the exam once. Took me two tries to get it too."

"Took me just one!" Asuma bragged causing Kurenai to kick the man on leg under the table. "Ouch! Hey…"

Tsuru stretched out her arms across the table in a catlike manner and rested the side of her head to watch the couple do their lover's quarrel.

"We'll talk about this later," Kurenai snapped. "Anyways, Tsuru. How are you and Kakashi?"

"That question's a little overdue, but I'm good!" Tsuru answered. "Kakashi's good too. Better than good actually. I think he went on a mission today though."

"Ah, so our normal lives resume," Asuma sighed. "We're next, Kurenai. Say goodbye to nice D or C-rank mission life until the end of the chunin exams. Although I am craving a little more action these days."

"Can't actually believe that I'm agreeing with you on this one," Kurenai responded to Asuma.

Tsuru continued to watch the two talk casually about their lives about things Tsuru didn't quite understand. Wasn't it a little masochistic that ninjas wanted to fight and risk their lives every day on the job? Well…It wasn't so different from what she wanted sometimes too. A rush to feel alive.

Evening was approaching and the three decided to part ways. Tsuru was making her way back home thinking about what to make for dinner when she saw Naruto walking alone with his head hung low. It was rare to see the boisterous boy look so…sad and lonely.

Kakashi spoke frequently about his students and Naruto was always the one who was loud and unpredictable. However, this was expected to be a product of Naruto growing up an orphan. Always alone and hated by his own village for a reason Kakashi only described to Tsuru as an unfortunate but fateful incident.

"Naruto!" Tsuru said walking up to the boy. Naruto perked up at the sound of Tsuru's voice, but his face fell again. "What wrong, kiddo?"

"It's nothing," Naruto replied dismissively. Tsuru didn't like this sort of attitude so she pulled Naruto's ear. "Ow, ow, ow, ow!"

"Talk," Tsuru demanded with her hands across her chest.

"It's just," Naruto stopped and sighed. "I want to be the best ninja. Ever. Better than the Hokage. But…Sometimes…Today, I couldn't answer even one of those stupid test questions and was so close to giving in! I mean, I know I passed and that's all that should matter, but I just…ARGH!" Tsuru listened to every word in Naruto's rather incoherent and disjointed rant. "Sasuke and Sakura-can were depending on me and I almost let them down."

"But you didn't," Tsuru said. "You didn't let them down. You pushed through, Naruto."

"I know, but-"

"Uh-uh," Tsuru wagged her finger in Naruto's face. "Even if you did give up, they would be pretty terrible teammates and awful friends for being mad at you. There are going to be a lot more times in life that are going to be a hell of a lot more difficult when you're going to feel giving up. Of course, you should persevere and do your best. Tough times make you stronger.

However, also know that it's okay to not be okay and that there are people who care about you now. Let them take care of you and know that they have your back no matter what."

"But what if they all leave?" Naruto asked. Tsuru's heart clenched at the question.

"Have some faith in those who care about you, Naruto. And know what you're worth. But if there ever is a time where someone leaves, then chase them. If they're worth saving, bring them back to you. Once they see you heart, they'll come back eventually." Tsuru wasn't too much taller than Naruto, but she still ruffled his hair as if he were a toddler.

Loneliness was a curse, but Naruto seemed like someone who wanted to turn that pain into strength and there was nothing more honorable. He was different from someone like Kakashi or even Tsuru who took their pain push people away. She and Kakashi had constantly played the game of distancing themselves from each other. At least for Naruto, it didn't have to be like that.

Tsuru entered an all too quiet apartment.

"Kakashi?" Tsuru asked. "I'm home?"

It had been a while since Tsuru hadn't come home to a place without Kakashi. It was a strange feeling and she wasn't sure if she liked it. Didn't he say that he would be home tonight? Was his mission running late? Tsuru tried to push her anxieties to the side and curled up on the sofa with a soft blanket. She would wait for him.

It must have been around four in the morning when Kakashi finally returned to the village. The mission had taken much longer than anticipated and he was in a bit of pain. The injuries were minor, but nothing he couldn't deal with himself. If it were up to him, Kakashi would just avoid the hospital.

Kakashi entered Tsuru's apartment without a sound. The place was dark and a blanket was discarded on the couch. He thought that Tsuru must have gone to bed, but before he could take another step something softly crashed into his body.

Her arms wrapped around him tightly and Tsuru buried her face into his chest. "Welcome home." Her voice was so mellow. Instinctively, Kakashi returned her embrace.

"I'm home."


	19. Chapter 19

"Koyubi-chan!" Tsuru snuck up behind the frail little girl. Over the weeks, Koyubi's hair had fallen out from treatment which made her start wearing a white beanie over her head. She had certain become thinner and she looked physically weaker, however Koyubi's expression was strong with the will to live.

"Nee-san" Koyubi gasped. "You shouldn't scare me like that! I could die!" Tsuru laughed at the rather grim joke from the nine year old.

"Surgery's tomorrow," Tsuru stated. "You ready?"

"Yup!" Koyubi smirked. "I started my fast this morning and my mom is here for me too!"

"That's wonderful!" Tsuru beamed. "I'll be around, so if you need anything…"

Koyubi gently nudged Tsuru with her tiny little fist. "Hey, I'm fine! Thank you, seriously, but I'll be fine."

Life was slower without Kakashi there all the time. It was the first time where Tsuru realized how fortunate the both of them were to have genin students. They always kept Kakashi around the village, but now that they were growing up and advancing in the system it also meant that Kakashi would regain his independence. The second round of the chunin exams were to start in a few days too which meant that there was limited access to the Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura particularly without Kakashi present.

Tsuru sighed and murmured to herself, "Maybe I rely on Kakashi-kun too much…" The blonde woman removed the bulky rubber gloves from her hands as she finished washing up the colorfully patterned dishes and utensils. Sometimes she thought her job at the daycare was patronizing, but it was the closest thing she could get to being a mother and she got paid for it. Then again, it was really annoying when men would would pass by and snicker or make snide remarks. It would be really nice to have Kakashi back at her side again to shoot them frightening glares.

After lunch was a light activity and then followed by a nap time for the kids. It was in this time that Tsuru took her own personal lunch breaks while another nurse watched over them. More times that not, Tsuru would forget to pack her lunch and found herself rushing out of the door last minute, but she still greatly appreciated the small half hour time to herself.

Today wasn't much different. Tsuru had forgotten her food again, but still made her way to a small and rather private courtyard on hospital grounds. As she made her way to the space, she did notice something rather unique. A raven haired boy dressed in blue with an indignant look about his face holding a little plastic bag.

"If it isn't my lucky day," Tsuru said as she approached the familiar face. "What brings you here Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke seemed to pout and shoved the bag into her face. "Kakashi told me you were prone to forgetting to eat, so he asked me to remind you to." Tsuru put a finger to her chin and gave Sasuke a puzzled look causing him to avert her gaze. "It's onigiri with tuna filling and some dango."

When Tsuru seemed too silent, Sasuke finally looked over at the woman's comically teary face. Before he could even react, Tsuru pounced on the rather stoic child and began her face against his like a cat.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" she cried repetitively.

"G-get off of me!" Sasuke verbally protested the physical contact but did little to stop her. He could sense how fragile she physically was and was afraid any degree of harshness could break her.

Finally, Tsuru pulled away from the boy and took the bag from his hands. "Why don't you join me, Sasuke!" Tsuru suggested optimistically.

"Sorry, I have to go train," Sasuke responded."

"Eh?" Tsuru sneered. "I bet you've been training since early. It's good to take breaks, you know! Socializing is important too, kiddo."

Sasuke appeared to ponder her words with a sense of reluctance before finally saying, "Just for a bit."

It was a good thing Tsuru was used to this kind of silence. Kakashi used to be so brooding and dark back in the day. The Copy Ninja's mind was always traveling to morbid places and Tsuru had to learn how to adjust to it because sometimes it was just better to let those thoughts ride themselves out. So Sasuke's silence was a reminder of how far Kakashi had come in his life and it was also, in a way, nostalgic.

The half hour passed quickly.

"Well I have to get back to work, but thanks for lunch Sasuke," Tsuru said with a grateful smile. "Let's do it again."

Without realizing what he was saying Sasuke replied, "Yeah, sure."

It was the first time someone didn't press him for details or tried to talk his ear off as a means to distract him. He appreciated the quiet company.

The following day, Tsuru came to work a little earlier than usual. It was the long awaited day of Koyubi's surgery. Tsuru knew a little bit about Koyubi's procedure. She had spoken with several nurses in passing and learned that it was a risky procedure with 50/50 survival rate. But Koyubi was like her. She was strong and she was lucky. Or at least…Tsuru hoped.

Upon arriving at Koyubi's room, Tsuru hesitated. Whether she had faith in the girl or not, there was little control she had over fate. Tsuru put on her a brave smile for Koyubi and knocked which met with a womanly voice, "Come in."

Tsuru slide the door open and said, "Excuse me."

There she saw Koyubi's mother sitting beside her brilliantly smiling girl. It something Tsuru once had too before her mother had passed.

"Tsuru nee-san!" Koyubi cheered.

"Hey there," Tsuru greeted and then turned to the older woman. "Are you Koyubi-chan's mom?"

"Oh, yes!" the woman said. "You must be Tsuru! Koyubi talks a lot about you. I'm surprised this is the first time we're meeting."

"Ah well, I work in daycare for the long term hospitalized kids so I don't really get to meet the families."

"I just wanted to extend my thanks for being good to my girl."

"Koyubi's special."

Worry and anxiety were filled in the mother's eyes. It was tangible, but Tsuru forced herself to keep smiling.

"She is," Koyubi's mother affirmed.

Tsuru looked over at Koyubi who kept up a convincing front with that ear to ear grin, but Tsuru knew the truth.

It wasn't long before Tsuru had to get back to work and Koyubi was sent into the surgery room. She tried keeping tabs on Koyubi's mother by bringing the lady little paper cups filled with tea to ease the panic she clearly was under. By the time Tsuru's lunch break rolled around, Koyubi must have been in surgery for at least four hours now and there was no telling when it would end. From the end of the hallway, Tsuru could see the woman practically rocking back and forth in her seat with anticipation.

"T-Tsuru…," the stutter came from behind Tsuru and halted her train of thought.

"Sasuke-kun?" Tsuru spun around to see the blushing boy. Sasuke had a another bag in his hand and immediately Tsuru's stomach began to growl.

"I guess it's time for a break," Tsuru giggled.

Sasuke today had gotten her a rather childish bento box with rice, rolled eggs, and boiled eggs. The bento was garnished with rabbit shaped carrot slices which only emphasized the mini tree shape of the broccoli around them. Tsuru thought that someone in Sasuke's life must have made him bento boxes like this one when he was younger.

"Did you eat, Sasuke-kun?" Tsuru asked while she broke her wooden chopsticks.

"Yeah," he replied cooly. "It's actually pretty late for lunch, you know."

"Is that so?" Tsuru laughed nervously. Tsuru picked up the orange bunny cutout and thought she should make Koyubi something like this after her surgery. Suddenly, the fact that Koyubi was inside the surgery room fighting for her life made Tsuru's appetite drop. Sasuke noticed the pale blonde's hand fall.

"Do you not like it?" Sasuke asked. "I can get something else."

"No," Tsuru answered. "This is really lovely, Sasuke. I mean it. It's just…It feels wrong to eat right now."

Sasuke felt his face ease a little. "I understand."

"It shouldn't be something a kid like you should understand, but I guess you never signed up for a life like this."

"No, I didn't and neither did you. It's pretty shitty." Tsuru flicked Sasuke's nose.

"Ouch! What the hell!"

"Language, Sasuke!"

"You're not my mother."

"I'm still older than you."

"Tch."

"Hmph."

Tsuru picked up a piece of fluffy egg and popped it into her mouth.

"Life isn't so shitty, Sasuke," Tsuru spoke after swallowing the savory food. "That is if you choose for it not to be."

There were many polarizing forces at work in Sasuke's life. He valued family and was learning to truly value friends especially his teammates. No matter how annoying Sakura and Naruto were, he didn't want to lose them like he had lost so much before. Failure was not an option for Sasuke. All in all, life was fine. Stagnant. But fine.

Not that Tsuru would know what it was like to live a life of violence, Sasuke still wanted to ask her what she would do if she were him. Something about her drew him to her. Whatever the mystic source that was because, it must have made a man like Kakashi fall in love with Tsuru. To Sasuke's shock, his curiosity was abruptly ceased when a shrill sound made his stomach drop to the floor.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" The anguish scream filled with horror and despair cut through the air. Tsuru didn't even realize the chopsticks slip from her grasp. Out of pure adrenaline, Tsuru shot up from her seat letting the contents of the bento box splatter to the ground.

"Oi, wait!" Sasuke yelled after Tsuru.

Tsuru raced down the nauseatingly stale corridor but stopped meters away from the scene. Koyubi's mother was on her knees screaming into her one hand while the other grasped at the bottom hem of the doctor's white attire. The doctor kept a still, but clearly exhausted expression. From the double doors of the surgery room, the red light turned off above and the doors opened. On a gurney was the silhouette of a child's body completely covered by a white sheet.

_She didn't make it._

The urge to run towards the Koyubi's mother was stopped by Sasuke who grasped Tsuru by her wrist.

"Don't," he said. "There's nothing you can do. Just let her grieve."

It didn't matter what kind of justification Tsuru tried to conjure up in her head. Sasuke was right. What could she do? If Koyubi's mother knew anything about Tsuru, she would know that Tsuru was also constantly walking between life and death. Tsuru's existence would only be another painful reminder.

Tsuru was allowed to go home early that day and Sasuke took it upon himself to walk his teacher's lover home. He was uncannily kind and Tsuru thanked him for it with a light hug which was meant more for herself than Sasuke.

"Whoever they were, they must've meant something to you," Sasuke noted.

"Yeah," Tsuru replied. "But Koyubi was suffering. I can't imagine the pain she was going through. For some of us, death might just be the kindest thing life could do."

Sasuke noticed the weight in Tsuru's voice. He and the rest of his team didn't know precisely what was wrong, but they could tell Tsuru was suffering too. Finally, he saw it. Her pain and her fatigue. She masked it well with a youthful appearance and bright smile, but you could tell me the dullness in her eyes that she was worn out.

"You should go back to training, Sasuke," Tsuru said. "The second exam starts the day after tomorrow, right? Make sure to rest too. Give Naruto and Sakura my best." Sasuke simply nodded and let Tsuru close the door bringing on a deafening silence.


End file.
